Sooner Be Blue

Mostly politics, a few current events, a squirt of seltzer down yer pants .. a little blog for my rambles and rants.

2008/12/31

Oh I love a scandal involving liars.

Tags:
@ 09:34 AM (10 months, 10 days ago)


An interesting development -- Vicki Iseman is suing the New York Times for saying that she had an affair with John McCain...but the Times is standing by its story. It should really be fun when they start with the sworn depositions and interrogations.

Read the rest of this entry ... (285 words left)

2008/12/30

When textile quotas end, will US jobs go, too?

@ 07:50 AM (10 months, 12 days ago)

"Companies worried about expiring limits on textiles"

From the Winston-Salem Journal: "CHARLOTTE -- Limits on Chinese textile imports to the United States will expire at the end of the year, causing officials at North Carolina textile firms to worry about competing with a government-subsidized industry.
 
North Carolina's textile industry has taken a blow from imports. The state had 173,100 textile and apparel jobs in 2000. That number dropped to 58,600 this year.
 
Officials said they worried that what happened in 2005 when import limits were lifted temporarily could happen again. The U.S. textile industry lost about 55,000 jobs in 2005 after China flooded the market with cheaper goods. [..]"
 
http://www2.journalnow.com/content/2008/dec/30/companies-worried-about-expiring-limits-on-textile/
 
Who's smart idea was all this outsourcing and "free trade" in the first place?
 
For one - Wal Mart CEOs and other execs who own a bunch of shares in corporations who have off-shored. The greedy bastards who make money from serf labor and the difference between what something costs to make and what they can sell it for.
 
Then there's the neo-cons and the neo-liberals (like Clinton) who told us that "Free trade will give us new markets and create new jobs!"
 
Well, it did no such thing...and next the "free traders" started saying "We all must adapt to a global economy!" Which is code talk for "We screwed up big time!"
 
I'd be for Free trade if all pollution standards and labor standards were the same. But, foreign manufacturers (or farmers) do NOT have to meet the same health, safety, and environmental standards that American manufacturers do.
 
Why should Chinese and Indian textile mills be able to dump toxic waste directly into their rivers upstream, while US mills have to pay millions to clean up the waste? Talk about an unfair playing field.
 
While I'm at it, allow me to rant about the fruits of Free Trade...all the poison crap the Chinese have sold us. The latest is five poison sea foods, including shrimp and bass, that the FDA has banned.
 
If you bought some cheap truck tires lately, you might want to check the brand...because close to a million dangerous Chinese tires were recently sold in the US.
 
Did you buy your kids any Thomas the Train toys for Xmas? Well, the ones made in China have enough lead paint to poison them.
 
If your pets haven’t died yet, they probably didn’t get any of the 60 million melamine-contaminated bowls of dog food.
 
Then there was the poison toothpaste...
 
Just think -- 60 percent of all imports are from China, so there’s a 60 percent chance something in your house is going to kill you...soon.
 
I never have understood why our nation started allowing the import of products or produce that can be manufactured or grown here.
 
Manufacturing brings wealth to a country, not a service based economy.
 

2008/12/29

Get your Turkish Zingers here!

@ 07:34 AM (10 months, 13 days ago)
 
"Shoes flung at Bush flying from shelves"
 
With two quick flicks of a wrist, a Turkish-made shoe has become an international best seller.
 
That shoe-tossing only lasted about four seconds, but never before in human history has a single act so radically changed men's footwear.
 
The shoe in question has sent sales soaring...the Turkish shoemaker has orders pouring in from Iraq, the US and Iran. He had to hire extra employees and has paid for an advertising gimmick.
 
"ISTANBUL, Turkey - For the past 10 years, model 271 has been the bestseller of Ramazan Baydan's Ducati line of shoes. It's got all the attributes of a workhorse – affordable and durable, chunky, yet presentable. To these winning qualities, now add another one: throwable.
 
According to Mr. Baydan, it was a black pair of his shoes that Iraqi journalist Muntazer al-Zaidi threw at President Bush during a Dec. 14 press conference....
 
... Baydan says that demand for the shoe – now renamed the "Bye Bye Bush" model, wholesale price $27 – has been booming. Orders are coming from Iraq, other parts of the Middle East, and even the United States and Europe.
 
The shoemaker says he is even preparing a new advertising campaign aimed, for now, at the Turkish market. It will feature the shoe held aloft on a stick, with the words "Bye Bye Bush, Hello Peace," below it. [..]"
 
http://www.csmonitor.com/2008/1229/p07s04-wogn.html
 
"Bye Bye Bush, Hello Peace"...I love it.
 
I also love the quote from the shoe company’s general manager about the spike in sales -- “Bush served some good purpose to the economy before he left.”
 
You know...Bush still has time to help many American businesses increase their sales...like in cream pies and tomatoes...oh, a host of things. He could travel from city to city and stand on a public stage dressed in a plastic suit. People would travel miles to stand in line. What is he waiting for? Cheney and Rove too.
 
What I wouldn't give to hit Karl Rove with a rotten tomato.
 

2008/12/28

"Don't say it in public, you moron!"

@ 06:41 AM (10 months, 14 days ago)

It seems that candidate for chairman of the Republican National Committee Chip Saltsman sent the members of the committee a holiday music CD that included a parody song called, "Barack the Magic Negro”...which was first aired in 2007 by Rush Limbaugh. Yes, "Negro."
 
Well, turns out that current RNC chair Mike Duncan is shocked, shocked about Saltsman's choice of stocking stuffers....asking how could anyone think it is appropriate. The CD also contains other little ditties such as, "The Star Spanglish Banner."
 
I really chuckled at this self-inflicted idiocy. It's so clueless as to the mood of the county...and only isolates the GOP further.
 
I listened to the song just to see what all the fuss is about, and the Sharpton impersonator does a good enough job...but it's not funny at all. Not clever or witty, just in extremely poor taste. Using the term 'Negro' for example.
 
And dang it, I will now be humming Puff the Magic Dragon for the rest of the day.
 
From the Washington Post, By Michael D. Shear: "WASHINGTON - Republicans who are vying to lead the national party offered a mix of reactions Saturday to the decision by one candidate for the job to mail a holiday music CD including the song "Barack the Magic Negro."
 
The ditty by conservative comedian Paul Shanklin refers to a March 2007 opinion piece in the Los Angeles Times by David Ehrenstein headlined "Obama the Magic Negro." In the piece, Ehrenstein argued that voting for Barack Obama helped white voters alleviate guilt over past racial wrongs. The parody is sung to the tune of "Puff, the Magic Dragon."
 
Chip Saltsman, who managed Mike Huckabee's presidential campaign, defended his actions, telling the Hill newspaper that the song and others on the CD, which was mailed to party members, were nothing more than lighthearted parodies.
 
But some rivals in the contest to chair the Republican National Committee (RNC) said it carried an inaccurate message about what the GOP stands for.
 
"In my opinion, this isn't funny and it's in bad taste," said Michigan GOP chairman Saul Anuzis.
 
Current RNC Chairman Robert Duncan, who is running for re-election, said of CD, "The 2008 election was a wake-up call for Republicans to reach out and bring more people into our party. I am shocked and appalled that anyone would think this is appropriate."
 
Not all of Saltsman's rivals criticized him. Former Ohio Secretary of State Ken Blackwell, who would become the first black RNC chairman, defended Saltsman and attacked the media.[..
 
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/politics/2008565684_gop28.html
 
So, big deal that black Blackwell isn't offended...he's in the same token category as Clarence Thomas of the Supreme Court. Sell-outs come in all colors.
 
And now, Limbaugh, Shanklin and Saltsman would like to convince you that the parody calling our next President a “Magic Negro” is merely good-humored, lighthearted, innocent satire.
 
My dictionary says satire means “the use of ridicule, irony, sarcasm, etc., to expose folly or vice or to lampoon an individual.” Does lampoon mean making fun or ridiculing someone’s race or ethnicity?
 
How does calling our next President a “Magic Negro” expose folly, or vice, or lampoon Barack Obama?
 
Hopefully, Chip Saltsman will win the GOP chair. Whatever it takes to drive the final nail into the coffin of this racist, greedy, fear-mongering, backwards Republican party is fine with me. My young Republican friends yearn for a new moderate Republican party.
 
And yes, I do know that Al Sharpton is the one who first called Barak Obama the "Magic Negro" in 2007. Okay, I can't stand Al Sharpton, or "cut his nuts off" Jessie Jackson either.
 
Why does the GOP think that just because one black person says something about another black person, that it automatically makes it right? Don't they know that there are blacks who do just as much harm to their race as ignorant whites?
 
Just shows how backward and out of touch the Republican party is.
 

2008/12/27

A parting shot from Preacher Bush

@ 08:24 AM (10 months, 14 days ago)

Last week the Washington Post had a piece about Bush granting new protections to health workers who refuse to provide care that's against their personal moral beliefs...a regulation that takes effect the day Obama is sworn into office.
 
"The far-reaching regulation cuts off federal funding for any state or local government, hospital, health plan, clinic or other entity that does not accommodate doctors, nurses, pharmacists and other employees who refuse to participate in care they find ethically, morally or religiously objectionable. It was sought by conservative groups, abortion opponents and others to safeguard workers from being fired, disciplined or penalized in other ways.
 
[T]he rule, which will cost more than $44 million to implement, gives more than 584,000 health-care organizations until Oct. 1 to provide written certification of their compliance. Those that do not comply face having their funding cut off or being required to return funding they have received.[..]"
 
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/12/18/AR2008121801556_pf.html
 
Why don't these health care "moral objectors" just skip medical school and go straight to an evangelical seminary and learn how to handle snakes, speak in tongues and become faith healers?
 
Maybe other doctors who disagree with this rule should not prescribe certain hypocrites their Viagra unless they're only using it to have a child....
 
Next the New York Times has an editorial on the subject:
 
"A parting gift to the far right, the [Bush administration] new regulation aims to hinder women's access to abortion, contraceptives and the information necessary to make decisions about their own health. What makes it worse is that the policy is wrapped up in a phony claim to safeguard religious freedom.
 
The law has long allowed doctors and nurses to refuse to participate in an abortion.... changes elevate the so-called right to refuse beyond reason to an increased number of medical institutions and a broad range of health care workers and services -- including abortion referrals, unbiased counseling and provision of emergency contraception, even to rape victims.
 
The impact will be hardest on poor women who rely on public programs for their health care.
 
[T]he Health and Human Services regulation is due to become effective on Jan. 20, Inauguration Day. By acting right away to suspend its implementation, President-elect Barack Obama and his choice to succeed Mr. Leavitt, Tom Daschle, can block irresponsible changes that threaten people's rights and defy the federal government's duty on public health.
 
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/26/opinion/26fri2.html?ref=opinion
 
A doctor who refuses to prescribe a patient the 'morning after pill' faces exactly zero personal risk for his/her ideological beliefs. What, exactly, does that doctor need protection from?
 
And when a rape victim is taken to a hospital for treatment, she has a right to accurate information about emergency contraction and immediate access to it. She may have no choice about where she is taken and doesn't have time to wait and weed out those who do not provide full services.
 
These doctors can believe whatever they want to as long as they're not imposing THEIR beliefs on those who do not share them...and asking to be paid anyway to boot!
 
If their beliefs keep them from offering otherwise legal care and services, then they can get the hell out the field.
 
Hmm...the Bushies know that President Obama will stop this regulation as soon as he can...so this smells like a Rovian ploy to set Obama up in a confrontation over both abortion and religious freedom right at the start....

As if he didn't already have enough on his plate. But that's those neo-cons for you -- always putting Country First.

2008/12/26

Hearts, minds, and...uh, other body parts

Tags:
@ 09:32 AM (10 months, 15 days ago)
 
"Little Blue Pills Among the Ways CIA Wins Friends in Afghanistan"
 
Hmm...the Horizontal Mambo vs Waterboarding....
 
From the Washington Post: "The Afghan chieftain looked older than his 60-odd years, and his bearded face bore the creases of a man burdened with duties as tribal patriarch and husband to four younger women. His visitor, a CIA officer, saw an opportunity, and reached into his bag for a small gift.
 
Four blue pills. Viagra.
 
"Take one of these. You'll love it," the officer said. Compliments of Uncle Sam.
 
The enticement worked. The officer, who described the encounter, returned four days later to an enthusiastic reception. The grinning chief offered up a bonanza of information about Taliban movements and supply routes -- followed by a request for more pills.
[..]
"He came up to us beaming," the official said. "He said, 'You are a great man.' "
 
"And after that we could do whatever we wanted in his area."
 
(By Joby Warrick Washington Post Staff Writer)
 
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/12/25/AR2008122500931.html
 
This cries out for a joke about thinking outside-the-box....
 
It isn't the first time the CIA has been 'creative' when it comes to incentives...but bribing with Viagra is a new one. Looks like the older warlords and chieftains won't be satisfied with bribes of tools, school equipment, and surgical assistance any longer.
 
The CIA used to hand out plain ol' cash...but had to stop because Afghan leaders with US dollars are singled out as cooperating with the unpopular Americans.
 
One American said the key is to "find a way to meet the informant's personal needs in a way that keeps him firmly on your side but leaves little or no visible trace." Obviously Viagra does the trick.
 
But what about the young wives? Don't those poor young women and girls have enough to put up with? They were probably glad that the old goat was too tired to be interested.
 

2008/12/25

Late-night jokes recap 12/26/08

Tags:
@ 07:59 PM (10 months, 16 days ago)
 
 
"It is freezing everywhere. It was so cold in Washington, even Bill and Hillary were snuggling." --Jay Leno
 
"It was so cold in Alaska, somebody is putting chapstick on a pig." --Jay Leno
 
"In fact, over on “24,” I saw Jack Bauer torturing a snowman. That’s how cold it is." --Jay Leno
 
"President-elect Barack Obama and his family are in Hawaii this week. To which President Bush said, 'You know, I prefer spending my Christmases right here in the United States.'" --Jay Leno
 
"Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger said in an interview on '60 Minutes' on Sunday that, if the Constitution allowed it, he would like to run for president. Yeah. Yeah. There's a switch, a Republican being stopped by the Constitution, when does that ever happen?" --Jay Leno
 
"The largest donor at the Clinton library turns out to be Saudi Arabia. Yeah. Well, some critics argue that such close financial ties to the Mideast could be a conflict of interest. However, Hillary Clinton says she will not advocate Arab policies. Except, you know, the practice of stoning adulterers." --Jay Leno
 
"NBC is showing, once again, the classic movie 'It's a Wonderful Life.' See, it is so different today. See, when they made that movie, back then, the government actually asked banks to account for what money was missing." --Jay Leno
 
"Bernie Madoff has been charged with swindling people out of $50 billion. I don't want to say he's unpopular, but today as he was walking in New York, he passed a manger scene and Joseph threw a sandal at him." --Jay Leno
 
"Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich says he will not fill Barack Obama's seat any time soon. He says he's going to wait until next summer when prices improve." --Jay Leno
 
"What a rough crowd last night. Rough, they were surly. They were quiet. I’m telling you. It was quiet in here. It was like a Lehman Brothers Christmas party." --David Letterman
 
"The suburbs are cold also. Up in Chappaqua, Bill and Hillary accidentally got into the same bed. It’s that cold." --David Letterman
 
"Insider tip. How many folks still have cars? Anybody here still have a car? You know, you can turn them in, take them in to Washington and they’ll give you your money back." --David Letterman
 
"And Ford Motors, by God, Ford Motors is working on a brand new car called the Fusion. It’s a hybrid and runs on a combination of gas and bailout money." --David Letterman
 
"One percent of Americans participating in this poll believe believe Dick Cheney is the best Vice President ever. Everybody else in the poll believes that that one percent should be wearing funny hats." --David Letterman
 
"The shoe-tossing guy in Iraq, you know, he wrote a letter to President Bush and he apologized. He said, “Dear president Bush, I’m sorry I threw a shoe at you.” And I was thinking, wait a minute. When is President Bush going to apologize for invading Iraq?" --David Letterman
 
"You folks around the country probably know this, but here in New York City it's freezing cold. It's so cold today that that Bernie Madoff is actually looking forward to burning in hell." --David Letterman
 
"It's so cold today President Bush was ducking ski boots." --David Letterman
 
"Barack Obama is on vacation in Hawaii right now. And today many newspapers carried pictures of a shirtless Obama playing in the ocean. Did you see that? Yeah. So as you’re thinking of things to be thankful for this holiday, remember, that could have been a shirtless John McCain." --Conan O'Brien
 
"The White House staff has been briefing Barack Obama’s team on a series of worst-case scenarios that could face the country after President Bush leaves office. That’s the latest. Yeah. Apparently, the absolute worst case scenario is that Bush doesn’t leave office." --Conan O'Brien
 
"In a recent interview, President Bush says that he's already begun thinking about his farewell speech. Yeah, which means he's only two years behind most Americans." --Conan O'Brien
 
"According to the Wall Street Journal, this is interesting, many of the people Barack Obama has appointed to his cabinet are excellent basketball players. Except for Hillary Clinton, who prefers lacrosse or field hockey." --Conan O'Brien
 
"In a new interview, Barack Obama says he plans on having a lot of jazz and classical music at the White House. After hearing this, President Bush said, 'I'd better go break the bad news to the Wiggles." --Conan O'Brien
 

Freedom is our greatest Christmas gift

@ 06:13 AM (10 months, 17 days ago)

Merry Christmas everyone! I know some people may think we don't have a lot to celebrate this season, what with how dim the economy looks, and with so many people worrying about their jobs; but we should still have hope because we live in the greatest country on earth. We've pulled though hard times before.
 
So as we gather together today, let's be happy that we have citizenship in this great nation...with the protection of our excellent Constitution.
 
Freedom is the greatest Christmas Gift given to us in America.
 
Remember how many of our forefathers gave their lives to preserve these freedoms for us.
 
Today I am thinking about how our sons, daughters, brothers and sisters in uniform continue to serve our country around the world...how they will not be home with their families this holiday season. So as you sit around the dinner table with your family today, please remember our folks serving in our armed forces...remember their sad families struggling back home without them.
 
President-elect Barack Obama reached out to these troops and their families in his holiday radio message, and also spoke directly to Americans who have lost their jobs in the struggling economy.
 
He said:"...this season of giving should also be a time to renew a sense of common purpose and shared citizenship. Now, more than ever, we must rededicate ourselves to the notion that we share a common destiny as Americans - that I am my brother's keeper, I am my sister's keeper. Now, we must all do our part to serve one another; to seek new ideas and new innovation; and to start a new chapter for our great country.
 
That is the spirit that will guide my Administration in the New Year. If the American people come together and put their shoulder to the wheel of history, then I know that we can put our people back to work and point our country in a new direction. That is how we will see ourselves through this time of crisis, and reach the promise of a brighter day....."
 
Here is the entire message:
 
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=Xy6aBVdOCg8
 
BTW--It looks as if most Americans think our new president is off to a good start. Obama's approval rating in a CNN poll out yesterday was 82 percent...four out of five Americans approve of his Transition work.
 

2008/12/24

Sarah Palin’s comin’ to town….

@ 05:44 AM (10 months, 18 days ago)

Grandma got run over by a wolf pack...thank goodness Santa was there with his 10 gage…and Grandma made it home on Christmas Eve…
 
Here's a Christmas card sure to win the playful heart of every Sarah Palin fan who perks up to the festive sound of sleigh bells and gunshot.
 
That just has to be Sarah Palin steering Santa’s sleigh while he takes aim at a wolf.
 
Word has it that it was circulated around Alaska’s Legislature last week:
 
http://www.adn.com/ear/v-gallery/story/630149.html?/ear/v-enlarge/story/630149-a630148-t3.html
 
You just cannot make this stuff up!
 

2008/12/23

A few words about Xmas

@ 06:44 AM (10 months, 19 days ago)

I wish you all the happiest of holidays, the merriest Christmas, the sexiest Saturnalia, or joyous Paganism...however you like to celebrate. One thing I ask - please don't try to lord it over others by being holier than thou.
 
Because of my family and culture, I'm a "Merry Christmas" girl by default. True, I am nonreligious, but I adore Christmas with its festive music, decorations and good cheer...the spirit of sharing and giving filled my childhood with the happiest memories. I celebrate Xmas with a kid's heart.
 
I would never ban Christmas decorations and celebrations from public places, I would just invite other religions to display their symbols too. I'm certainly open to other festivities, and will accept whatever vibes you send my way...as long as they're positive ones, and I'll try to do the same.
 
Just this year, if at all possible, let's avoid any debate on "The War Against Christmas."
 
Preaching like a holier-than-thou loudmouth is not a good example of living one's life well. Let us all be a shining example of our ideal worldview/mythology/ideology and keep the loudmouth-ery at a minimum.
 
A society built on liberty gives us the freedom to celebrate our private holidays however we see fit - as long as it doesn't infringe on the rights of others. Who cares if your Walmart greeter says "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas"? Walmart (or any other retailer) is not supposed to be a religious missionary...besides, the drive for profit overrides it.
 
Another thing -- around Christmas each year there are always those holier-than-thou loudmouths who complain about the use of the abbreviation "Xmas" as some kind of blasphemy against Christ and Christianity. "Did they take Christ out of Christmas, Daddy?"
 
I write it both ways. Remember that the word "Xmas" is of Christian origin. The letter X comes from the Greek letter chi (X) - the language the New Testament was written in - which is the first letter in the Greek word, Christ.
 
By the fifteenth century Xmas was a widely used symbol for Christmas. Then along came the Gutenberg printing press with moveable type. To cut down on the cost of printing, "Xmas" became an accepted way of printing "Christmas"...along with the abbreviations Xian and Xianity. Even Webster’s dictionary says that the abbreviation Xmas was in common use by the middle of the sixteenth century.
 
So get over yourselves, O'Riley , Hannity and Limbaugh.
 
Last thing about holidays -- They're all made up. We humans made them up so we could celebrate on a specific day every year. From Christmas to Kwanzaa to the Fourth of July, even our own birthdays. All are invented to celebrate something fantastic, cultural, or spiritual.
 
It's not a bad thing that we make up these holidays...they represent our stories. Humans without stories would be like birds without song. That's what makes us human - telling stories.

2008/12/22

Late-night jokes recap 12/22/08

Tags:
@ 06:09 AM (10 months, 20 days ago)
 
"Gay leaders are furious at Barack Obama because he picked an anti-gay minister to deliver a prayer during the inauguration ceremony. Yeah. Gay leaders are also furious at Obama because the tie he’s planning to wear is all wrong." --Conan O'Brian
 
"Hey, it snowed in Malibu. That is unbelievable, isn’t it? Yeah. Five inches of snow in Malibu, where people aren’t used to snow. They were trying to snort it. They didn’t understand." --Jay Leno
 
"This week President Bush hosted the annual White House Hanukkah party. Yeah, there was an awkward moment when Bush made a wish and blew out all eight candles." --Conan O'Brian
 
"Mexico City has begun working on expanding its subway system. That’s right. Apparently, they’re adding stops in San Diego and Los Angeles." --Conan O'Brian
 
"Thank you for coming out on such a cold day. It is cold, isn’t it? Man, everybody was shivering. It’s like the whole city’s in rehab." --Jay Leno
 
"And it’s not just here. It was so cold in Chicago, Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich was trying to sell Senate seat warmers." --Jay Leno
 
"The roads were closed in Malibu. In fact, there was so much snow, a lot of celebrities couldn’t get to the global warming conference." --Jay Leno
 
"In Barstow, people were really excited. It never snows there. They were going, “It’s raining crystal meth! We can’t believe it!”" --Jay Leno
 
"And the big financial story, Bernard Madoff, the man they call the most hated man in New York, as you know, has been arrested after confessing to running this Ponzi scheme that defrauded investors out of $50 billion. That’s almost hard to believe. But the good news, today he was named A.I.G.’s man of the year." --Jay Leno
 
"I tell you, the economy’s rough. People are standing behind President Bush just to get the free shoes." --Jay Leno
 
"The nice thing about the holidays is the holiday spirit. Let me give you an example of how the holiday spirit affects people. You know that guy that threw the shoes at President Bush? Well, today, he was throwing fruit cakes."--David Letterman
 
"Now here’s something historical. In January, all five living presidents are scheduled to have lunch together. Clinton suggested the VIP room at Hooters."--David Letterman
 
"Everybody looks forward to 'Time' magazine naming their 'person of the year.' And today, they named Barack Obama person of the year. That's right. Finally, things are starting to go his way." --David Letterman
 
"Sarah Palin also honored today. She was named 'person of the year' by LensCrafters. And in about an hour, they'll name somebody else." --David Letterman
 
"We're talking about Sarah Palin, who has a brand new Christmas album. It's entitled 'I Can See Bethlehem From My House.'" --David Letterman
 
"Dick Cheney said that we made the right decision to go to war in Iraq. And I said to myself, 'Well, that's good enough for me, by God.'" --David Letterman
 
"The Illinois Supreme Court refused to hear a motion to throw Governor Blagojevich out of office. Afterwards, Blagojevich thanked the Supreme Court and said, 'Your check is in the mail!'" --Conan O'Brien
 
"This week, Dick Cheney was interviewed by ABC News, and he said that he will miss being vice president. Then he said, 'And I'll really miss being president.' That was the best part." --Conan O'Brien
 
"The economy is in bad shape. I went shopping over the weekend. I got an Illinois Senate seat for $149. Amazing, marked down from half a million." --Jay Leno
 
"And it's not just here in America. Queen Elizabeth has announced that the economy is so bad in England, she is asking all members of the royal family to reduce their spending, otherwise, they would face the ultimate disaster, you know, having to get a real job." --Jay Leno
 
"In New Jersey, the state Senate is working on a bill to legalize medical marijuana. They say it's the one thing that could actually ease the pain of having to live in New Jersey, so that's good." --Jay Leno
 
"And a big surprise on the Sunday morning news shows. Senator John McCain said he may not support Sarah Palin if she's around in 2012. Of course, the bigger question, will McCain be around in 2012? That's probably the bigger question, but hey." --Jay Leno
 
"The current administration, of course, is winding down, not just President Bush, but everybody is sort of talking about the eight years. Yesterday, Dick Cheney was interviewed by ABC News, and he reflected on his eight years in office. Yeah. And he turned into a bat and disappeared in a puff of smoke." --Conan O'Brien
 

2008/12/21

We can have Cheney's shredder...

Tags:
@ 07:22 AM (10 months, 21 days ago)

...when we pry it from his cold, dead hands...

Read the rest of this entry ... (729 words left)

2008/12/20

Late-night shoe jokes 12/20/08

Tags:
@ 05:55 AM (10 months, 22 days ago)
 
"George Bush is over there in Baghdad saying goodbye to the troops, and this Iraqi journalist heaves a couple shoes at the President. And we thought, hopefully that's just a one-of-a-kind episode. Unfortunately, however, the news coming out of the Middle East is that Iran is developing a long-range loafer." --David Letterman
 
"People are still discussing the shoe-throwing incident at our president. ... It was reported today that the Iraqi journalist who threw the shoes at President Bush had his arm broken when security subdued him. And even worse, it was his shoe-throwing arm. That guy is out for the season." --Conan O'Brien
 
"President Bush announced before he leaves office, he wants to visit the poorest regions of the world. You know, any place where people can't afford to buy shoes." --Jay Leno
 
"That Iraqi journalist who threw his shoes at President Bush the other day said he planned his attack for months. Planned it for months? That's what he said! I mean, take off one shoe. You throw it. You throw the other shoe. He planned it for months. And he still missed both times!" --Jay Leno
 
"The guy is being called a hero in the Arab world. So, he has this plan and it's a failure. And he's a hero. You know, if that's the standard, Bush would be the biggest hero in the Arab world." --Jay Leno
 
"President Bush made a surprise visit to Detroit today. Honestly, people in Detroit are upset with him, but I understand auto workers threw brake shoes at him." --Jay Leno
 
"As you know, the Bush administration has a new slogan: 'Duck!'" --Jay Leno
 
"As you know, President Bush took a surprise trip to Baghdad over the weekend and had a press conference with the Iraqi premier. A reporter threw his shoes at him, almost hit him. And the guy who threw the shoes, this guy was so angry, he was so anti-Bush, at first people just assumed he was an American journalist, but no." --Jay Leno
 
"In fact, to give you an idea how bad the economy is in Iraq, the shoes that were thrown at Bush came from Payless." --Jay Leno
 
"And it's not just President Bush, today somebody threw a pair of shoes at Sarah Palin. And she was very upset. She said, 'Do you have these in black?' and threw them back." --Jay Leno
 
"How about that guy that heaved his shoes at the president? Of course, everybody is saying well, what happened to the Secret Service? Good question. Where is the Secret Service? From now on, alright, take off your shoes. You want to see the president? Alright, slip out of those shoes." --David Letterman
 
"It turns out this guy was described as a hot head. He's a guy who is an Iraqi journalist. They say he's a hot head with poor journalistic skills. Well, no surprise, today he was offered his own show on Fox News." --David Letterman
 
"But I've got to give President Bush credit for this, because he's taking it all pretty well. He says that he's actually happy about the shoe-throwing episode, because he says it proves finally that Iraq does, in fact, possess foot wear of mass destruction." --David Letterman
 
"Today, President Bush told reporters that the shoe-throwing incident was one of the weirdest moments of his presidency. Yeah, Bush said the only thing weirder was the time he got re-elected." --Conan O'Brien
 
"Have you watched this tape? Some people are criticizing the Secret Service, because the shoe thrower caught them off guard. The man was able to throw a second shoe. A spokesman for the Secret Service said, 'Sorry, but we were laughing our asses off.'" --Conan O'Brien
 
"I was impressed by how nimbly President Bush was able to dodge those shoes. I know he's got a lot of dodging experience from his years during the Vietnam War, but this was pretty slick." --Jimmy Kimmel
 
"So the guy who threw the shoes is now a hero in Iraq. They say he's shown the world that Iraqis have no masters, but I think what he really showed the world is that Iraqis have no aim, because he was like four feet away and couldn't hit him." --Jimmy Kimmel
 
"By the way, this is the country we thought had nuclear weapons. It turns out they have a pair of size 9 Hush Puppies instead." --Jimmy Kimmel

Bush bails 'em out

Tags:
@ 03:34 AM (10 months, 22 days ago)

Yep, senate Republicans can block congressional action all they want, but they can't stop their glorius leader from bailing out US auto manufacturers.

Read the rest of this entry ... (551 words left)

2008/12/19

Obama pisses off both the left and the right

@ 09:11 AM (10 months, 22 days ago)

The left, because he chose a homophobe to pray for him on swearing in day...the right, because one of their own is going to pray for someone who is pro-choice.
 
Yes, Barack Obama's decision to have Rick Warren give the invocation at his inauguration has a lot of people upset. Warren is the evangelical pastor of the enormous Saddleback Church in CA, and author of the best-selling book "The Purpose Driven Life." He has compared abortion to the Holocaust, and opposes same-sex marriage.
 
People are saying that after all his talk about change, Obama is giving over the stage to a known homophobe. That there is no excuse for this, that there are so many leaders of the faith community that preach equality for all.
 
Lefties are running around saying things like, "Legitimizing bigotry is weak" and "Face it, Progressives, we have been conned."
 
Listen up, Barack Obama will the strongest supporter of gay rights in presidential history, he's ready to make sweeping reversals of Bushie restrictions on reproductive rights and family planning...and the "Don't ask/don't tell" policy of the military will disappear before you know it.
 
I say Obama is just acting in accordance with what he said about being everybody's president. He said, "We're not going to agree on every single issue, but what we have to do is to be able to create an atmosphere where we can disagree without being disagreeable and then focus on those things that we hold in common as Americans."
 
I believe him when he says he wants to build bridges and have a government full of diverse views...but I also know that Obama is a political animal.
 
We should remember that Barack Obama is becoming president of one of the most divided nations in the modern world. We've been almost paralyzed because of our deep, deep disagreements...and the way we savage the opposing side.
 
We also have to remember that Rick Warren's views on other social issues - global warming, poverty, and especially of HIV/AIDS - are much more progressive than the rest of the God-Squad.
 
One thing for sure - I would rather Obama give Warren a few minutes to speak about religion in this appropriate time and place, than appoint him to a policy making job in his administration.
 
Besides...Warren may be giving the invocation, but the Rev. Joseph Lowery, who's a brilliant progressive and champion of the civil rights era, is giving the benediction. And the benediction is the last word because it comes at the end....
 

2008/12/18

Newt Gingrich criticizes GOP for using Gingrich tactics

Tags:
@ 10:00 AM (10 months, 23 days ago)


There is no one more sleazy and slick than he...watch him shift his philosophy 180 degrees to fit the political climate. Funny about him decrying the politics of attack...his original creation...

Read the rest of this entry ... (467 words left)

2008/12/17

Republicans to Bush: No TARP for Detroit

@ 06:55 PM (10 months, 24 days ago)
 
Isn't it ironic? Many of those Southern senators who voted against the bailout come from states that have given substantial subsidies to auto manufacturers -- FOREIGN auto manufacturers who operate plants in their states.
 
From politico.com: "Seven conservative Republican senators urged President Bush today not to use money earmarked — in the generic sense, at least — for the financial sector to fund an auto-industry bailout. The request follows a plea yesterday from House Republicans calling on Bush to similarly lay off the TARP funds.
 
"Last week, the Senate rejected a legislative bailout after the United Auto Workers (UAW) union refused to agree to changes necessary to help the Big Three automakers become competitive. According to news accounts, your administration is considering providing TARP funds to the automakers without requiring the UAW and the automakers to make sufficient reforms. Absent such restructuring, we do not believe any amount of money will succeed in saving these companies," write the senators.[..]"
 
http://www.politico.com/blogs/thecrypt/1208/Republicans_to_Bush_No_TARP_for_Detroit.html?showall
 
Conservative Republicans want the UAW to collapse, period...and if it takes a collapse of the auto industry to make that happen, well then, so be it.
 
Actually it's a grand slam -- they get to dismantle the last effective union in the country, they create a workforce of serfs, and they get a handsome bonus from their foreign masters.
 
They don't seem to worry about ruining the economy so badly that no one will be able to save it.
 

David Letterman's 12/15/08 Monologue

Tags:
@ 06:00 AM (10 months, 25 days ago)

I hope things go better for Santa Claus this Christmas. Remember what happened last year? He was shot down over Alaska by Sarah Palin.
 
Over the weekend, a church that Sarah Palin attended was burned. Very serious, disturbing, but they are looking for a suspect. They think it’s Joe the arsonist. That’s who they are looking for.
 
Bush was in Baghdad having a press conference, and a reporter from Iraq jumps up and starts heaving shoes at the guy. And in Iraqi, or Arabic, he starts screaming, “Here’s your farewell kiss, you dog!” I mean it was the same goodbye I got from NBC. Do you remember that?
 
They arrested the guy and they’re trying to find out if he is a Shoe-ni or a Shoe-ite. My five-year-old is also writing jokes.
 
But it’s the same old story. You hear this over and over again. A guy, a crazy guy, goes into a Payless store, purchases a pair of Rockport shoes, and they didn’t even do a background check on him.
 
But you’ve got to give Bush credit. I mean, the guy moved pretty quickly. He reacted pretty good. Too bad he didn’t react that way with bin Laden or Katrina or bin Laden or the mortgage crisis or bin Laden or Afghanistan or bin Laden or the Lehman Brothers.
 
Yeah, it was a bit of a press conference and he was over there for his farewell thing and the guy is lobbing shoes. Bush did pretty good, though. I don’t think Bush really has dodged anything like that since the Vietnam War.

Jay Leno's 12/15/08 Monologue

Tags:
@ 05:48 AM (10 months, 25 days ago)

Well, folks. Looks like we finally found something President Bush is good at: Dodgeball!
 
As you know, yesterday in Iraq, President Bush was attacked by a shoe-icide bomber.
 
President Bush was speaking at a news conference in Iraq when a journalist threw two shoes at him. You see what President Bush did? You see what he did to keep from being hit? Something he’s never done before. Lean to the left.
 
Hey! You got to admit, whatever you think of the guy, Bush has got good reflexes. Even Bill Clinton was impressed. You know, Clinton’s an expert at ducking shoes, ashtrays, lamps, everything.
 
Now, here’s my question, and no offense here. But where was the Secret Service? I mean, shouldn’t they at least have jumped in front of the second shoe? See, that’s when Bush realized he was on his way out, when the Secret Service is going, “Yeah, we’re guarding the new guy now.”
 
Well, here’s my favorite part. On CNN, they brought in an expert on Iraqi culture. And he said, “Let me clarify what happened here.” He said, “In the Arab world, throwing your shoes at someone’s head is considered an insult.” Oh, really? Really, as opposed to here in America, where it’s a huge compliment.
 
Well, the interesting thing was the journalist who threw the shoe was immediately arrested, and then offered his own show on MSNBC.
 
And a teacher in England has been fired after she told a class of 7-year-olds there was no Santa Claus, which, ironically, is the same thing Congress told the automakers.
 
Well, the Bush Administration said they are ready to step in now and help the auto industry. And believe you me, whenever the Bush Administration gets involved in something, it is solved immediately. So, I think we’ll be fine on that front.
 
Well, the latest talk is that Caroline Kennedy wants to be appointed to Hillary Clinton’s senate seat. In fact, today, Caroline Kennedy got a call from Illinois Governor Roy Blagojevich saying, “How much you willing to pay for it?”
 
At a press conference this week, Jesse Jackson Jr., who is candidate number five for Barack Obama’s old Senate seat, strongly denied he did anything wrong or improper. But now people are saying his brother might be involved. They say Jesse Jackson Jr. could be punished politically for what his brother did, to which Jeb Bush said, “Tell me about it.”
 
And speaking on ABC’s Sunday morning show “This Week,” John McCain said that Sarah Palin could not necessarily count on his support if she runs for president in 2012. McCain said, “We have some other great young governors out there.” Yeah, too bad he didn’t pick one of them to run with.
 
Well, here’s Wall Street’s latest scandal. It’s only Monday. A man named Bernard Madoff, the former chairman of Nasdaq, has been arrested and confessed to Federal officials that he ran a Ponzi scheme that defrauded investors of $50 billion. The name of the Ponzi scheme: Nasdaq.

2008/12/16

Shoe is a 4-letter word for Arabs

Tags:
@ 09:56 AM (10 months, 25 days ago)


Lots of shoe jokes going around...my favorite is "The insurgency is in its last throws."

Read the rest of this entry ... (546 words left)

Time for a little tongue in cheek

@ 04:40 AM (10 months, 26 days ago)

 

4 minute video has Adolph Hitler and the gang talking about the bursting of the housing bubble and of the Fuhrer's failed flip of his McMansion.

The expression on the faces of his subordinates when he asks about his 401k is priceless.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNmcf4Y3lGM

 

2008/12/15

Heck of a job wingnuts

Tags:
@ 10:38 AM (10 months, 26 days ago)


The New York Times got hold of a 513-page draft report by the Special Inspector General for Iraq Reconstruction, and are circulating it around DC. It says what we already know -- that the Bush gang screwed up Iraq big time...that everything they touched there turned to shit or caught fire.

Read the rest of this entry ... (386 words left)

The Republicans are gonna love this plan!

@ 10:32 AM (10 months, 26 days ago)

 

Blogger Balloon Juice has found a solution to the Big 3's woes -- and frankly, it sounds a whole lot smarter than Bob Corker's plan to revoke the pensions of a bunch of blue collar retirees.

"We need to invade Michigan and rebuild the state from the ground up. We will be greeted as liberators, we have clear supply lines, and we can easily rebuild the auto industry with the kind of money we spend on other countries we invade. Hell, our new Secretary of State, Hillary of Clinton, spent the better part of the past year fighting for the rights of average folks from Michigan, so think of the good will we have with the public. This is very doable. Just tell Congress we will give KBR no-bid contracts to fix Detroit.

And citizens of Baltimore, Altanta, St. Louis, and DC- you better get your shit together or you are next."

http://www.balloon-juice.com/?p=14583

Yeah! Shock and awe. The Michiganders won’t know what hit 'em...we can be in and out within six weeks without a single casualty.

 

2008/12/13

Late-night jokes recap 12/13/08

Tags:
@ 03:44 AM (10 months, 29 days ago)
 
"Don't you love watching congressmen lecture auto executives on how to run their business? I mean, you got people that put us a trillion dollars in debt lecturing people who put us a billion dollars in debt." --Jay Leno
 
"Economy not looking good. Some bad job numbers. Employers cut over 500,000 jobs. This is the worst job loss in 34 years. The only bright side, at least Bush is losing his." --Jay Leno
 
"Hey, you probably saw this on the news. A very embarrassing moment at the Illinois State Capitol today. Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich attended the opening of the nativity scene. And when the three wise men showed up with gifts for the baby Jesus, Blagojevich demanded half the loot." --Jay Leno
 
"Yesterday was Governor -- is it Blagojevich or Bla-son-of-a-bitch? -- it was his birthday. You know what sign Blagojevich was born under? 'For sale.' I believe that was the sign." --Jay Leno
 
"Spitzer was a lot more fun and a lot easier to say, too. Yeah, when former New York Governor Elliott Spitzer heard about Governor Blagojevich, he said, 'Hey, you call that a scandal? No, I don't think so. At least when a New York governor goes down, he has some fun on the way. '" --David Letterman
 
"People close to the case talked about Blagojevich. They said that he was willing to do anything for money. That's why he was going to sell the Senate seat. See, that is so wrong. You know, in this country -- let me tell you something. If you want money, you do what everybody else does, okay? You go to Congress and you demand a bailout. That's what we do." --Jay Leno
 
"Well, it looks like the automakers are going to get their bailout money. But not if the Republicans have anything to do with it. I understand Republican Senator David Vitter, remember him? The one involved with all the hookers? Remember that guy? Well, he blasted the auto industry. He called the plan ass backwards. That's what he called it, ass backwards. And he should to know, because he used to pay extra for that." --Jay Leno
 
"Don't you love how these guys care nothing about the working man? The working girl, oh, they'll give her all the money." --Jay Leno
 
"In a recent interview with ABC, President Bush said he is not a literalist when it comes to the Bible, or the Constitution either, for that matter." --Jay Leno
 
"Golden Globe nominations out today, and Sarah Palin was nominated for one. Her category is Outstanding Comedy Performance in a Presidential Campaign." --David Letterman
 
"Hey, what are you folks getting for Christmas? Well, I tell you what, Illinois is getting a new governor." --David Letterman
 
"They've been doing some research into Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich. Have you seen this guy? Well, it turns out that thing on his head actually mated with that thing on Donald Trump's head. It's getting ugly." --David Letterman
 
"Rod Blagojevich was arrested for trying to sell a seat in the Senate to the highest bidder. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. And folks, if convicted, he could wind up in prison, where his seat will be sold to the highest bidder." --Conan O'Brien
 
"President-elect Barack Obama, today, called for Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich to resign. Blagojevich said, 'I'll do that if the price is right.'" --Conan O'Brien
 
"Speaking of Governor Blagojevich. Today -- coincidence -- today is his birthday. So for the second day in a row, Federal agents jumped out and yelled, 'Surprise!'" --Conan O'Brien
 
"A plan to bail out the Big Three automakers stalled in Congress today. Yeah. As a result, Congress plans to buy a better-built Japanese bailout plan." --Conan O'Brien
 
"Joe the plumber is back in the news today. Joe the plumber, even though he spent several weeks on a bus campaigning with John McCain, he told Glenn Beck that he felt 'dirty' after discussing the issues with him. I don't know how to tell you this, Joe, but of course you felt dirty. You work in other people's toilets." --Jimmy Kimmel
 
"But Joe actually did have praise for McCain's running mate, Sarah Palin. He called her the real deal. That's great, I'm glad they got along. And they're perfect for each other, in a way. In fact, they're actually starring in a new movie together. I don't know if you've heard, it's called 'Dumb and Plumber.'" --Jimmy Kimmel
 
"How many people in our studio audience got your seats tonight because you paid off Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich?" --Jay Leno
 
"And President Bush talked about his religious believes on ABC's 'Nightline' the other night. When the host asked Bush if he was a literalist when it came to the bible, Bush said, no, no, he's actually a Methodist." --Jay Leno
 
"We're not kidding about this economy, which is so bad that Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich had to mark down the price of a Senate seat 40%." --David Letterman
 
"But did you hear about this guy? Blagojevich is charged with corruption and apparently he was stealing a lot of money, getting a lot of bribes and kickbacks and hiding them in his hair." --David Letterman
 

2008/12/12

His hair should've warned them!

Tags:
@ 11:17 AM (10 months, 29 days ago)
 
I've read for years about how righties get their knickers in a knot because they think when a Republican has a scandal the media jump on it, put it in lights and run the hell out of it...but when the culprit is a Democrat the media hardly pay attention.
 
Well, go tell that to Gov. Blagojevich, he's a star on cable news 24/7 -- also Democrat Gov. Eliot Spitzer, the call girl aficionado.
 
And stop trying to paint Blago as Obama's best pal. The governor is not a close associate of the President-elect. Indeed, in Fitz's affidavit, Blago called Obama a "motherf*ck*r" for wanting him to appoint someone (probably the Jarrett woman) that the governor wouldn't receive money from. Also see all those news reports that suggest it was Obama chief-of-staff Rahm Emanuel who blew the whistle on the governor.
 
The media must be running out of angles because this new slant is stunning -- the Sun-Times asks whether Blago's hair indicates he's crazy.
 
"Is Blago's hair a sign of sickness?
 
DIAGNOSING BLAGOJEVICH | Gov's chestnut mane might be sign of narcissistic personality disorder, psychologists say "
 
http://www.suntimes.com/news/metro/blagojevich/1326323,CST-NWS-diagnose11.article
 
I don't know if it means he's crazy, but I have to admit, I hate his hair...it scares me. How on earth did a head of hair like that get elected governor? Just looking at that hair helmet brings to mind a perfect campaign slogan -- I'm Only in This For the Bribes, the Booze and the Broads.
 
Really...he should be tried, convicted, and sent off to prison on just his hair alone. Just looking at that corrupt deceitful head of hair, you can almost hear a lawyer pleading the Fifth Amendment on its behalf.
 
I've seen that hair on televangelists and used car salesman. Shifty mob guys have hair like that. Drooly guys with that hair are always at the Playboy Mansion. Shiny suits with hair like that try to sell you time-shares in Mexico. Lounge lizards have hair like that.
 
A guy with hair like that only marries you for your money.
 
Maybe I'm being unfair.
 
Sure, many bad guys have crew-cuts, Ronald Reagan pompadours, dreadlocks, perms, comb-overs, bald heads, plugs, weaves, and flat-out rugs...they turn up in mug shots all the time.
 
So...maybe I shouldn't judge a guy by his hair. Is it Blagojevich's fault he has hair like that?
 
Well, yeah, it is.
 
He has to really work at it, hair like that needs a lot of time and attention...it needs an entire entourage. Not only is he  immoral...he's a vain self-centered SOB.
 
The guy who's bringing him down is Patrick Fitzgerald...now there is an honest head of hair.
 
PS -- yes I have thought of John Edwards and Mitt Romney. See? Doomed I tell you.
 

2008/12/11

A Christmas gift for you

@ 08:45 PM (11 months, 11 hours ago)

Bloghi "traffic reports" show that my readership has grown this past year, from a few hundred a day to several thousand. I'm amazed, but flattered that you keep coming back. I'm sorry I can't interact with you through the Comments section, but you can't imagine what filth I had to clean out when I left it open.
 
Anyway, I want to show my appreciation with this little Christmas gift -- a recipe for the best dang cookies you ever tasted. A Laura Bush recipe - I always liked that lady. You could give them as gifts...money is a little tight for a lot of us. People love to get baked goodies. I do advise that you make the bigger cookie, using the 1/4 cup dough. Enjoy!
 
Cowboy Cookies
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon. baking powder
1 tablespoon baking soda
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 cups (3 sticks) butter, at room temperature
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
1 1/2 cups packed light-brown sugar
3 eggs
1 tablespoon vanilla
3 cups semisweet chocolate chips
3 cups old-fashioned rolled oats
2 cups sweetened flake coconut
2 cups chopped pecans (8 ounces)
 
Directions
Prep Time: 25 minutes
Bake Time: 17 to 20 minutes
Yield: About 3 dozen cookies (see note below)
1. Heat oven to 350 F.
2. Mix flour, baking soda, cinnamon and salt in bowl.
3. In 8-quart bowl, beat butter on medium speed until smooth and creamy, 1 minute. Gradually beat in sugars; beat to combine, 2 minutes.
4. Add eggs, one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla.
5. Stir in flour mixture until just combined. Add chocolate chips, oats, coconut and pecans.
6. For each cookie, drop 1/4 cup dough onto greased baking sheets , spacing 3 inches apart.
7. Bake in 350 F oven 17 to 29 minutes, until edges are lightly browned; rotate sheets halfway through. Remove cookies from rack to cool.
Note: For 6 dozen small cookies, use 2 tablespoons dough for each. Bake at 350 F for 15 to 18 minutes.
Copyright 2000, Laura Bush

Goodbye Joe, you gotta go, me oh my oh

@ 09:15 AM (11 months, 23 hours ago)

How long do we have to listen to this phony Joe guy babble on? Wingnut hate-fest radio by day, Fox News by night.
 
One thing for sure -- he sure knows how to draw the spotlight back to himself.
 
I couldn't care less if I never hear from Joe-the-unlicensed-plumber's-apprentice ever again, but this story from Politico is just too good to pass up. Apparently "Joe" grilled McCain on the Wall St. bailout and came away, shall we say, disillusioned.
 
"Joe Wurzelbacher lashed out Tuesday at former GOP presidential nominee John McCain, the man who made Wurzelbacher famous as “Joe the Plumber.”
 
Wurzelbacher told conservative radio host Glenn Beck that he felt “dirty” after “being on the campaign trail and seeing some of the things that take place.”
 
Recalling a conversation he had with McCain about the $700 billion financial industry bailout in September, Wurzelbacher said: “When I was on the bus with him, I asked him a lot of questions about the bailout because most Americans did not want that to happen.”
 
“I asked him some pretty direct questions,” he continued. “Some of the answers you guys are gonna receive — they appalled me, absolutely. I was angry. In fact, I wanted to get off the bus after I talked to him.” [..]
 
http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1208/16385.html
 
He got his fifteen minutes out of McCain and then throws him under the bus.
 
Ahbut, he had nothing but praise for Sarah Palin.
 
Playing up Sarah "Real Deal" Palin as the future of the GOP while simultaneously stabbing McCain in the back...the kind of guy you want on your team.
 
She cost McCain two percent in the election and Republicans think she's the future of the party. It boggles my mind. She can't even perform the easiest politician task -- pardoning a turkey for Thanksgiving -- without it becoming a total PR disaster.
 
It tickles me when righties say we Dems are afraid of her, Afraid of her? Hardly...more like grateful for her. She will never pull more than the 30 percent of America that are as simple minded as she is.
 
I'm begging Republicans to run her in '12...it'd be best thing for all...honest. Pleeeease...Saturday Night Live needs her.
 
Hey, how about a Palin/Plumber ticket? They might could carry Utah.
 

2008/12/10

Oh lord, another crooked Democrat!

Tags:
@ 09:30 AM (11 months, 1 day ago)


Like Hunter S. Thompson said -- "When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro."

Read the rest of this entry ... (667 words left)

2008/12/9

Who do you believe, me or your lying eyes?

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@ 10:02 AM (11 months, 2 days ago)

Let the rewrite begin -- the Bush Legacy Project.
 
The White House is circulating a memo saying that George W. Bush promised to uphold the honor and the dignity of his office, and has kept that promise.
 
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-bush9-2008dec09,0,3087216.story
 
It's true that, even though Bush's presidency has been marred by one scandal after another (torture, outing a CIA agent, politicizing federal agencies, etc.), he did not get into trouble over an intern's BJ.
 
But my standard for "honor and dignity" is a little higher than that. Semen stains are better than blood stains any day.
 
We have Bush giving a lot of chatty prime time TV interviews lately in a blatant attempt to overhaul his legacy. White House press secretary Dana Perino, calls them ‘exit interviews.'
 
First an interview with Charlie Gibson of ABC...obviously a member of the Legacy Project. He didn't challenge the ridiculous things Bush said -- like how Saddam Hussein "was unwilling to let the inspectors go in."
 
Next, Bush sat down with "Nightline" co-anchor Cynthia McFadden to talk a little bit about the auto bailout and the economy...and a lot about his relationship with Jesus, the Bible and the fine line between religion and science. (What fine line?) “I think evolution can — you’re getting me way out of my lane here. I’m just a simple president.”
 
Don't remind us.
 
Of course, painting a rosier image would certainly help his poor parents, who seem to be suffering. His daddy has been known to break down and cry at public functions and his mother is recovering from an ulcer operation.
 
Karl Rove has been seen spinning away, in Manhattan he argued in an Oxford-style debate against the proposition that "Bush 43 Is the Worst President of the Last 50 Years."
 
You can certainly see Rove's handiwork in grooming Bush to come across as more personable and human...even admitting mistakes. Don't know if it's Mission Accomplished, so far his approval rating has gone from 24 percent to 28 percent.
 
But there's more. Speech writer Peggy Noonan is going around saying, "At Least Bush Kept Us Safe." This talking point has always puzzled me. The dust barely settled after the first World Trade Center bombing when, just six weeks after he took office, Pres. Clinton tracked down, tried and jailed the bombers. There were no further terrorist attacks on US soil until nine months after Bush took office.
 
Yet you never hear the wingnuts acknowledge that Clinton kept us safe from terrorism.
 
The reality is that George W. Bush has driven this country over a cliff...we are in more trouble and greater danger than when he came into office. He will be handing President Obama the most unstable world environment we've had in a generation.
 
So spin spin spin, Karl and Peggy...but you can't make gold out of bullshit. We the people have a very good memory.
 
We remember the successful terrorist attack on American soil, the anthrax attacks, an unnecessary war, breaking the military, the Katrina debacle, the tanking economy, turning a surplus into a $455 billion deficit, wire-tapping, 800 signing statements, our trampled Constitution, torture, corruption and cronyism, outing a CIA agent, no-bid contracts, international scorn, a polarized country...etc...etc...etc.
 
Just as the name Hoover is linked to the Depression, Nixon to Watergate, LBJ to either Viet Nam or Civil Rights, Kennedy to Bay of Pigs...in the distant future the name Bush will be remembered for Iraq and the Housing/Bank collapses.
 
And probably for being the worst president ever.
 
Wait, I CAN find one good thing that he did -- battling AIDS. Under the Bush administration, more than 2 million people infected with HIV - most of them in Africa - have received lifesaving anti-retroviral treatment. Even Obama praised him for this.
 
Too bad about his insistence on dangerous abstinence-focused prevention programs over here...
 

2008/12/8

Britney Spears Guide to the Big 3 Bailout

Tags:
@ 09:39 AM (11 months, 3 days ago)


Love that cartoon that says - "Auto execs arrive at the Congressional hearing in their newest fuel efficient car"...and we see three clowns getting out of a clown car.

Read the rest of this entry ... (713 words left)

2008/12/7

Well, finally, freezer burn!

@ 11:16 AM (11 months, 4 days ago)

Crooked politician Freezer Cash Bill Jefferson lost his bid for re-election!
 
After all, the FBI found tens of thousands of dollars, neatly wrapped in tin foil, all nestled down with the burgers and steaks in his home freezer...you'd think he'd been shown the door by now.
 
The Democrats took away some of his committee seats, and mumbled something about innocent until convicted...but he remained in the lower chamber.
 
I was wondering how long the good people of Louisiana’s second district were going to let Jefferson hang on to his seat...seems that yesterday they had finally had enough.
 
"(CNN) — Nine-term Democratic Rep. William Jefferson, who has been battling scandals and a federal indictment for the past three years, lost his bid for re-election on Saturday.
 
Republican challenger Anh “Joseph” Cao, an attorney and community organizer, defeated Jefferson in the 2nd Congressional district race. He will become the first Vietnamese-American elected to Congress.
 
With 100 percent of precincts reporting, Cao had almost 50 percent of the vote to Jefferson’s 47 percent.[..]"
 
http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/12/06/louisiana.congress/
 
Hey, maybe we really are approaching a post-racial, post partisan age. Jefferson’s district is heavily African-American and leans Democratic. Still, they chose to oust the embarrassing Jefferson and bring in a Vietnamese-American Republican and give that a try.
 
When they were forced to pick between an honest moderate Republican and a crooked moderate Democrat, they went for the Republican.
 
Well done, Louisiana. You closed the book on a nasty chapter and chose to move forward, hopefully with a tad more integrity and pride.
 
It’s rare that I see a move to the right as progress...but I’ll take it.
 

Late-night jokes recap 12/7

Tags:
@ 10:18 AM (11 months, 4 days ago)
 
"Republican Senator Saxby Chambliss won the runoff election for the Senate seat for Georgia. Republicans think that Sarah Palin campaigning him for him helped him win. You know, this is the first candidate she’s helped elect since, I guess, Barack Obama." --Jay Leno
 
"Stop saying that we've overcome racism just because we've found a qualified black man and elected him president. Everybody knows we won't have true equality until we elect a dumb, unqualified black man. [video of Bush doing African dance]" -- Bill Maher
 
"Hank Paulson must drop the $700 billion in bailout money from a plane and let everyone scramble for it on the ground. Sure, it'll be chaos, but at least this way we have a chance of getting our money back." -- Bill Maher
 
"And as you know by now, Barack Obama has officially named Hillary Clinton as Secretary of State, which I think is a great idea. If anybody can bring peace to the Middle East, it’s Hillary. I mean, think about it. She has proven over and over again you can live side by side with your biggest enemy and still make it work." --Jay Leno
 
"And in an interview with President Bush, Bush says he wants to be remembered as the man who liberated 50 million people. Well, when you think about it, he did. I mean, thanks to him, 50 million Americans are now liberated from their savings account, their 401(k)s, car payments, mortgage …" --Jay Leno
 
"And Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has declared a fiscal emergency here in California. I think that’s what he said. He either said fiscal emergency or he said, “I need a physical, I need some surgery.”" --Jay Leno
 
"What a difference a couple of weeks makes. Remember last month, the three auto company heads flew to Washington in private jets looking for their bailout? Remember they own the private jets? Well, this time, the three CEOs drove in their own hybrid cars; 520 miles they drove in their own hybrid cars. See, you know what I think the government should have done here? Make it like 'The Amazing Race,' you see? You drop these guys off, no money, no transportation, give them some tools, they have to build a car. First one to Washington, they get the bailout." --Jay Leno
 
"And this week, President Bush was awarded the International Medal of Peace award. How did that happen?" --Jay Leno
 
"The Labor Department announced that over 1,100 lawyers lost their jobs last month. Think about it. So lawyers are losing their jobs. ... CEOs are being forced to work for a dollar a year. Ann Coulter's jaw is wired shut. In many ways, this could be the greatest Christmas ever." --Jay Leno
 
"Former Florida Governor Jeb Bush said in a recent interview that Republicans 'cannot be the old, white guy party.' That's what he said. I believe he made this statement at a national shuffleboard convention in Boca Raton, Florida." --Jay Leno
 
"Well, President Bush is opening up a little bit. He gave an interview to ABC News. Bush said he wished the intelligence on Iraq had been different. Hey, how many wish the intelligence in the White House had been different?" --Jay Leno
 
"John McCain was in the news, he gave his first press conference since the election. And he said, 'For a lot of people, Sarah Palin was an energizing factor during the campaign.' Unfortunately for McCain, those people are called Democrats." --Conan O'Brien
 
"Everyone's talking about the American auto industry right now. A new study just came out and found that the Ford Motor Company makes the cars with the highest safety rating. Of all the cars, yeah. Yeah, apparently, Ford cars are so safe because they never leave the dealer's lot." --Conan O'Brien
 
"President-elect Barack Obama announced his new economic team. You know what he should do? Hire those people who were in charge of his fundraising campaign. We can pay this thing off in like a week." --Jay Leno
 
"A political organization has filmed a new TV ad thanking Sarah Palin for all she did during the presidential campaign. Yeah. I believe the political organization is called the Democratic Party." --Jay Leno

2008/12/6

US troops served ice containing human remains

Tags:
@ 06:17 AM (11 months, 6 days ago)


No, really. Wait until you get a load of this. I’m stunned by this story and I have no idea why it isn’t the lead story of every news report in the country!

Read the rest of this entry ... (557 words left)

2008/12/5

All hat and no cattle

@ 09:24 AM (11 months, 6 days ago)

George W, your facade is crumbling.
 
The Rhinestone cowboy is moving from the ol' ranch house movie prop into a $2 million house complete with servant's quarters.
 
Whatever will he do with his time now that he won't have any brush to clear for the the cameras?
 
From The Associated Press: "WASHINGTON (AP) — President George W. Bush and first lady Laura Bush have bought a home in an affluent North Dallas neighborhood, where they will live after the president leaves office in January.
 
Laura Bush's press secretary, Sally McDonough, said Thursday that the Bushes purchased a home in the Preston Hollow area, where some of the state's wealthiest residents live in some of its most expensive houses.[..]"
 
http://tinyurl.com/569eyk
 
I never did buy into that BS that Bush is a cowboy, happy at "home on the range"...he had never lived on a ranch in his life until he decided to run for president. Rove advised him to emulate Ronald Reagan and buy the Crawford ranch in 1999 as a slick bit of PR for the presidential campaign.
 
Up until then Bush's preferred weekend retreat was the Rainbo Club, an exclusive lakeside hunting club just south of Dallas.
 
Yep, some of us saw through that cowboy crap from Day One. Try and find a picture of him on a horse. Mexico's President Fox had planned for them to go riding together when Bush visited Mexico. Bush wormed out of it somehow because he can't ride a horse.
 
We knew that the ranch in Crawford was used only as a prop, like Reagan's movie ranch, where Bush posed for the cameras doing cowboy chores, copying Reagan. But Bush's Crawford photo op background was strictly about getting him elected.
 
I doubt if anyone will miss the fake Crawford Ranch backdrop that the media stood in front of while reporting ...the one with the shabby buildings and the hay bale. It wasn't even on Bush's property...it belonged to the rancher down the road...who rented it out when Bush needed a "Green Acres" set.
 
Ever notice that, Winter, Summer, Spring or Fall, it was the same old hay bale? If that had been a real ranch the hay bale would have been eventually used.
 
Remember the Crawford press conferences, footage of Bush and dignitaries at the ranch? We never saw the house -- for security reasons they said -- all we saw was them standing around in the driveway. Blair and Putin looking slightly silly dressed as cowboys.
 
The main reason we never saw that "homey ole ranch house" was because it was actually a 10,000-square-foot single level mansion/compound. The house was completed on November 7 -- election day 2000. Just in time for the curtain to go for "show time."
 
Those photos of Bush wearing his leather jacket as he rambled around the ranch in his "ole pickup" -- supposedly knowing every tree and bush -- all pure fantasy from Karl Rove's brain!
 
Remember, Turd Blossom was suffering from hero worship. His reaction in his own words, when he saw George W. Bush for the first time, in a leather jacket, jeans and cowboy hat -- "Wow! I mean, WOW!"
 
I should make a Village People joke right about here...but I won't.
 
Seriously, Rove and Bush remind me of those con artists who blow into town, rent an upscale office just long enough to look legit so they can hoodwink investors. Then, once they have fleeced enough "marks"...they disappear.
 
Thank goodness it won't be long now...

 

2008/12/4

Flip a coin?

Tags:
@ 09:28 AM (11 months, 7 days ago)
 
The senate race in Minnesota still has legs. The official recount ends this Friday, but neither camp expects the process to end anytime soon. The Minnesota Canvassing Board still has to decide what to do with 6,000 contested ballots...you just know this means lawsuits galore.
 
And what happens if the race is unresolved when Congress convenes in January? Republican Gov. Pawlenty will have to appoint a temporary senator - surprise, it will be a Republican - to serve until *someone* wins the Coleman/Franken contest.
 
Why, oh why do we still run our elections like a third world country? Why can't we have a Holiday on Election Day and some sort of National Voter Registration?
 
From the New York Times: "THE lizard people have eaten a vote in Beltrami County. That’s not so strange in a recount like the one underway in Minnesota — voters do all kinds of inexplicable things like inscribing “lizard people” in the write-in slot, as one did, invalidating his ballot.
 
Much more alarming is that hundreds of votes have disappeared in the still too-close-to-call Senate race between Norm Coleman, the Republican incumbent, and Al Franken, the Democratic candidate. The missing ballots expose a fundamental flaw in our way of doing elections — one that proves the recount in Minnesota is futile.
 
....Luckily, Minnesota’s electoral law has a provision for ties. After all the counting and recounting, if the vote is statistically tied, the state should invoke the section of the law that requires the victor to be chosen by lot. It’s hard to swallow, but the right way to end the senatorial race between Mr. Coleman and Mr. Franken will be to flip a coin.
 
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/04/opinion/04seife.html
 
I saw Al Franken's recount lawyer on TV last night saying that, according to their way of tracking the recount results, they believe Al Franken now leads Norm Coleman by a margin of 22 votes.
 
I’m confused. The people of Minnesota can physically count 10,000+ lakes, but they can’t count optically scanned ballots where some computer actually does the counting?
 
But then Minnesotans are famous for their crazy politicians and seem to cut them a lot of slack. Exhibit A, Jesse “The Body” Ventura. It must be how they pass the long winters up there...find weirdos, put ‘em in office, hunker down with a hot toddy and watch the show.
 

2008/12/3

Meeeeoooow...cat fight in Alaska!

Tags:
@ 09:58 AM (11 months, 8 days ago)


"Murkowski to Palin: Leave my seat alone"

Gah, can too much schadenfreude kill you?

Rightwing cat fur gettin' ready to fly...this has World Wrestling written all over it. Pass the popcorn.

From politico.com: "Alaska Sen. Lisa Murkowski has some Republican-to-Republican advice for Gov. Sarah Palin: If you want to make a run at the White House, keep your hands off my Senate seat.

Murkowski, up for reelection in 2010, is nervously awaiting word on whether John McCain’s former running mate will run against her in the GOP primary. But she says Palin is the one who should be nervous.

... Murkowski says a run against her would be fraught with risk. If Palin lost, her stock would drop just ahead of a potential 2012 presidential run. And if she won, she’d be a backbencher in a chamber that is dominated by seniority — and would have to begin her presidential campaign as soon as she took office.

...As Murkowski’s tense talk suggests, the politics between the two women is personal. Palin won the governor’s race in 2006 by defeating Frank Murkowski, the senator’s father. On the presidential campaign trail this year, Palin crowed about upending the “old boys network” in Alaska.

When asked this summer about Palin’s suggestion that her father was one of those “old boys,” Murkowski bristled and cut an interview short. [..]"

http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1208/16112.html

Palin has an 80 percent approval rating among Alaska Republicans. But Tina Fey was right when she said Palin was "not goin' back to Alaska." She's hardly been there since last summer...which may be a problem come election time.

Sen. Murkowski comes from a prominent political family in the state, so she is bound to have a good grasp of state politics. Seems that Sarah has pissed off a number of people there, including a number of Republicans.

Palin is pure small town politics, which plays well with the “base"...but doesn't translate well to national level politics. You do not win national elections with 25-30 percent of the electorate.

But she's ridin' high right now...her cheerleading stint in Georgia will have her convinced that she’s the Wingnut Golden Girl.

Could that sneaky Murkowski be luring Simple Sarah into her corner to let the helium out of Palin's balloon?

No matter. If Lisa Murkowski does our work for us -- exposing Palin locally and possibly taking her out -- fine with me.

Also, Jeb Bush has planted his flag with the Republican Party, going to run for the Senate...that'll put Palin in the closet.

 

2008/12/2

Bill Maher 12/2

Tags:
@ 08:01 AM (11 months, 10 days ago)

From Bill Maher's HBO show "Real Time"...

Read the rest of this entry ... (436 words left)