Sooner Blue

Let it be known that I, a pro-union Democrat, vehemently disapprove of some pro-union protest signs I've seen on TV .. the ones showing Gov. Walker as Hitler, or saying "Don't Retreat, Reload" with a picture of Walker with crosshairs on his face.

I condemned the same type of signs when the Tea Partyers carried them and I condemn them now .. especially the crosshairs one, which is distressing considering the recent shooting of Rep. Gabrielle Giffords.

Someone said maybe the sign's creator was going for irony by borrowing a phrase and image from Sarah Palin, but I still think it's unconscionable.

You do not joke about such things, maybe in your living room, but not on national TV! Never forget - there are crazies on both sides.

"Rush Limbaugh called Michelle Obama a hypocrite, criticizing her for eating ribs on vacation and said she isn't following her own dietary guidelines. Well, isn't that the morbidly obese pot calling the kettle African-American?" -Jimmy Kimmel

"Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid says he wants to outlaw prostitution in his home state of Nevada. Prostitutes say they're not going to take this lying down. For less than $50 bucks an hour." -Jimmy Fallon

"George Clooney says he's had sex with too many women to ever run for office. He was immediately made Prime Minister of Italy." —Conan O'Brien

"Forty years since the War on Drugs began. This makes Charlie Sheen our most decorated veteran." –Jay Leno

"Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi said that people protesting against him are under the influence of 'hallucination pills.' In a related story, Charlie Sheen just boarded a plane to Libya." -Conan O'Brien

"The king of Saudi Arabia announced that he is giving his people $37 billion in subsidies and payments. It's not a stimulus package, it's a 'don't overthrow me' package." —Jay Leno

Here's a guy who's nuts — Moammar Gadhafi. Aretha Franklin called, she wants her hat back." —David Letterman

"Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi was on TV and he was angry and defiant. Then he went off the air and no one has seen him since -- kind of like Keith Olbermann." —Jay Leno

"Gadhafi said he will fight the protestors until the end and he will die as a martyr. The protestors responded by saying, 'Deal.'" —Jay Leno

"In order to acknowledge gay members Facebook added two new relationship options: 'In a civil union' and 'In a domestic partnership.' Then, to make sure they didn't miss anyone, they added 'One time in college.'" —Conan O'Brien

"Economists say that with all this unrest, gas prices could rise to $5 a gallon. The good news is that instead of this money going to ruthless America-hating dictators, it will go to ruthless America-hating democracies." -Jay Leno

"Texas is reportedly going to give college students the right to carry guns on campus. So I guess that next semester, every college student in Texas is getting straight A's." –Conan O'Brien

"Yemen's president says that despite protests, he won't leave office. His exact words were, 'The Oscars are Sunday, I have a widescreen TV at the palace. You do the math.'" –Conan O'Brien

"President Obama filled in as the coach of his daughter Sasha’s basketball team. Sasha evidently listened to her Dad, because all she did was drive straight down the center and piss everyone off." –Conan O'Brien

"People in Libya want Moammar Gadhafi to leave. The problem is, he'll be replaced by his idiot son, Moammar W. Gadhafi." –David Letterman

"If Gov. Scott Walker is driven out of power in Wisconsin, there will be a power vacuum that may be filled by the Muslim Brotherhood." –David Letterman

"I'm glad we have a day for the presidents, but shouldn't we have a day for Congress when the Senate and the House can kick back and not worry about getting anything done? Oh, wait." –Craig Ferguson

"In the Mideast Muslims are getting in fights with their former supporters. The Shiites are hitting their fans." –Jay Leno

"All across the Middle East in the streets, people are demanding democracy. It's amazing. The only way in America you get people to get worked up like that is to threaten to give them health care." –Bill Maher

"New rule: Stop calling it Obamacare. It's not like Obama will be the doctor for your next prostate exam. That's just a common fantasy of Republican men." Bill Maher

"Kim Jong Il just turned 70 years old — but he doesn't look a day over crazy." –Craig Ferguson

[a tip of the hat to Daniel Kurtzman, NYT-laughlines, and newsmax.com]

That little German psycho with the funny mustache.

So, are Republicans and the Koch brothers working together to continue Hitler's dream of busting the unions? Could this be true?

Dang, where's my chalkboard?

It's all becoming clear now .. quick, another piece of chalk!

See, if Republicans and the Kochs are successful - pretty soon many government programs can be privatized through NO-BID contracts.

Because, buried deep in Walker's bill to destroy public service unions, is a little known provision that gives him power to sell off Wisconsin state owned public utilities via no-bid contracts.

Read about it here in the Capital Times:

"....The lobbyists for Koch Companies Public Sector registered with the state on January 5, two days after Walker's inauguration.

The expanded lobbying effort by the Koch brothers in Wisconsin raises red flags in particular because of a little discussed provision in Walker’s repair bill that would allow Koch Industries and other private companies to purchase state-owned power plants in no-bid contracts. [..]"

Hello? This will open the way for large, politically connected corporations to buy up the state’s power plants on the cheap.

Looks like the Koch brothers are so confident that they're getting a sweet deal from WI on power plants that they are already advertising for managers for those power plants. Read about it here.

Boy howdy, wouldn't corporations just love to have free reign to privatize union jobs .. they could dismantle the healthcare programs, environmental regulations .. all the good government laws that protect the working class ..

Hah, it isn’t about budgets or money .. it’s about crushing labor unions to death so they won't have money to back them dang Democrats come next election.

See, last November Republicans had their dried up little hearts set on taking 20 governor seats from the Democrats .. but they only nabbed 12. Why? Because public-employee unions have power and money from all those automatic dues ...

Stripping public workers of their right to collective bargaining is just the first step ... "United we bargain, divided we beg."

Here's the skinny from journalist Howard Fineman:

"....For all of the valid concern about reining in state spending... the underlying strategic Wisconsin story is this: Gov. Scott Walker, a Tea Party-tinged Republican, is the advance guard of a new GOP push to dismantle public-sector unions as an electoral force. ...

Last fall, GOP operatives hoped and expected to take away as many as 20 governorships from the Democrats. They ended up nabbing 12. What happened? Well ... the power and money of public-employee unions was the reason. ...

The GOP strategic aim is simple enough. If they can abolish union collective-bargaining rights, they can undermine the automatic payment of dues to the public-employee union treasuries. Shrinking those treasuries and reducing the union structure and membership will make it harder for Democrats and their allies to communicate directly with workers. [..]"

I should add that some people don't agree with Fineman's thesis .. they say unlimited corporate funding is much more important as a factor .. that unions are small players these days.

Ah well, small players or not, unions are the only competition big business has. If you want to own and control everything - people included - you have to eliminate the only competition.

James Dickey, the guy who wrote "Deliverance," once said - "The thing about those North Georgia folks is, while smilin' at you, they'll gut shoot you."

People are upset because one of those smilin' GA crackers asked Rep. Paul Broun (R-GA), at a town hall meeting - "Who is going to shoot Obama?"

The question was met with laughter, there are even reports that Broun chuckled .. wait for the videos. At any rate, he did not immediately condemn it. He responded by changing the subject to health care:

"The thing is, I know there's a lot of frustration with this president. We're going to have an election next year. Hopefully, we'll elect somebody that's going to be a conservative, limited-government president that will take a smaller, who will sign a bill to repeal and replace Obamacare."

It took Broun three days to confront the question head-on .. he issued a statement, saying, "I deeply regret that this incident happened at all."

Broun should have condemned this question immediately .. especially since the attempted assassination of Rep. Gabby Giffords is fresh in our minds. And I'll bet that's what the town hall cracker had in mind .. 'someone tried to kill Giffords, who will shoot Obama?'

Sadly, we are accustomed to crazy crackers making vile remarks .. but the thing that outrages me is the way a United States Congressman dealt with the question.

Think of it - a US elected representative didn't stand up and say it was not appropriate after someone made a direct or implied threat to our president's life.

Hell, even John McCain had the guts to correct that crazy lady at one of his campaign rallies who said that Obama was an Arab, and "had Muslim in him."

But, those who keep tabs on Tea Party crazies like Broun aren't surprised .. during the president's SOTU address, he was texting trash about Obama.

No kidding, since Broun was sworn in as a member of the 111th Congress, he has accused President Obama of being a socialist, a Marxist, un-American (literally, he's a noted birther), of using AmeriCorps as a nefarious plot to emulate Hitler's Germany, of not believing in the Constitution, of believing in "socialism" .. and any number of asinine remarks.

Why should anyone be shocked that Fox News/Glenn Beck fans think we should start assassinating presidents and members of congress that they've been told are the equivalent of Islamists, Communists, and Nazis?

How many Republicans spoke out when Sharron Angle said - "And you know, I'm hoping that we're not getting to Second Amendment remedies. I hope the vote will be the cure for the Harry Reid problems."

I heard on TV that the Secret Service had interviewed the GA cracker who asked who will 'shoot' Obama, and the case is a 'closed matter.

Ah well, one good thing about this incident is that it was reported. Hopefully, the time has come when not everyone in the crowd is going to look the other way.

Read more here.

After a month in "rehab," and just days before he was due to return to work on his hit comedy "Two and a Half Men," Charlie launched into ugly tirades against his bosses .. called one a "contaminated little maggot".

Read the latest here.

"Look what I'm dealing with, man. I'm dealing with fools and trolls. I'm dealing with soft targets, and it's just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee … they lay down with their ugly wives and their ugly children and just look at their loser lives and then they look at me and say, 'I can't process it.' Well, no, and you never will! Stop trying! Just sit back and enjoy the show."

On CBS exec producer Chuck Lorre:

"I'm tired of being told 'You can't talk about that, you can't talk about that.' Bull S-H-*-T. There's something this side of deplorable that a certain Chaim Levine — yeah, that's Chuck's real name — mistook this rock star for his own selfish exit strategy, bro. Check it, Alex: I embarrassed him in front of his children and the world by healing at a pace that his unevolved mind cannot process. Last I checked, Chaim, I spent close to the last decade effortlessly and magically converting your tin cans into pure gold. And the gratitude I get is this charlatan chose not to do his job, which is to write. Clearly someone who believes he's above the law.

I violently hate Chaim Levine (Chuck Lorre). He's a stupid, stupid little man and a p**sy punk that I'd never want to be like." ...[..]"

Wow .. isn't there a Mel Gibson award for this sort of thing?

Needless to say, CBS and the producers decided to shut down "Two and a Half Men" for the rest of the season .. "based on the totality of Charlie Sheen’s statements, conduct and condition" .. way to go Charlie, that's several hundred people out of work .. on the biggest hit comedy of the last decade.

Not to mention losing out on $1.2 million for each episode .. what happens when you run out of money for cocaine and porn stars?

Want to take a bet on if the show returns? I think Lorre once said he wasn't interested in reframing the show as "One and a Half Men." But making money is what it's all about for the show biz suits.

They could probably overlook Sheen's bad behavior involving drugs, alcohol and women - after all, he managed to show up on time for work, even though the show shut down production twice in two years for him to go to rehab - but these nasty, personal racist attacks are quite another matter.

I guess what surprised me most was the real-name rant .. it had to be anti-Semitic .. I mean Sheen's real name is Carlos Irwin Estevez....

.. about that prank pulled on Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker, when it comes down to it, it's good for a titter and not much else, even though there was evidence that Walker is illegally peddling influence, even though it's useful to know what Walker's strategy is .. it's just sort of how the game of politics is played.

It will be good fodder for commercials .. but I would prefer to win on substance ...

Truth be told, there are plenty of Democratic executives and legislators who might fall for the very same gag with a prank from the "left" .. think Soros.

Righties are trying to put George Soros in the same category as the Koch brothers .. but you'd be hard pressed to find Soros looking to drive down the wages of the American working class, or reduce their rights in order to increase profit margins.

The most typical thing about the prank is - it shows just how far politicians will go to bow and scrape and always make time for rich guys because of the cash they put up.

My point is, maybe if the rich actually paid their fair share of taxes, our political representatives wouldn't be such whores ...

Everybody is chatting about how a blogger prank-phoned WI Gov. Walker.

Here's the vids and transcript.

What made me laugh the most was when Ian Murphy, pretending to be Koch, talked to Walker's chief of staff, Keith Gilkes, and told him he couldn't leave a return number because - "My goddamn maid, Maria, put my phone in the washer. I'd have her deported, but she works for next to nothing."

That little satire of the GOP ought to have set off alarms and blown his cover .. but Gilkes just invited "Koch" to call back and speak directly to the governor.

Apparently being a racist dick is credential enough.

And, in a way, it's comforting to know that Team Walker is staffed by idiots .. or maybe secret union members.

To me, one of the most damning parts of the transcript is the subservient attitude (he sounded like some low-level peon trying to impress the CEO) of an elected public official towards a wealthy private citizen .. who is not even his constituent. What right does a KANSAS billionaire have to weigh in on Wisconsin's labor laws?

We need to thank you Gov. Walker, because what's really happening in this country is now being spelled out in flashing neon lights for all to see.

Another goody - "Koch's" offer to fly him out on some vacation, and Walker's "that'll be awesome" .. will make a priceless clip in any Democratic ad ..

Use this fake phone call Democrats .. use it over and over and over again, 24/7. Remind the public that we now have undeniable proof what Big Money and Tea Partyers are up to.

Two more goodies, besides the fact he took the call and spent a good 20 minutes on it, are - "I thought about sending in fake protestors" .. and - "Don't worry, I wasn't going to negotiate in good faith."

Walker's plan was to bring Dems back under false pretenses, set the trap, then screw them over. So much for the notion of acting in good faith.

After more sunlight shines on all this, how many Americans will still believe that R’s and D’s should just sit down together and work out their differences?

What makes this so disturbing is how a Governor will be all chummy with a billionaire union buster, and then treat his own constituents with such contempt.

Ah well, the public is catching on .. look at the latest polls. I just saw on TV that the majority in WI DISAGREE with Walker .. disapprove 53.0 percent .. approve 46.0 percent.

His office is above the stage
behind a thick scarred wooden door
a desk piled high with bills, receipts
a small safe bolted to the floor
Envious friends say "Man, how sweet
to be the guy behind the Scene!"
He puts aside the payroll page –
it's time to fix the ice machine.

The overhead is suffocating;
electric, rent, insurance, beer
the mobbed-up dumpster, glassware, liquor
mics / cables / amps / repair
advertising, ASCAP sticker
bar staff, wait staff, bouncers, sound
(the owner talks of relocating –
he might as well just burn it down)

Bands talk of blood and sweat and tears
they want more money, better dates
He knows that if they don't sell drinks
there's no point to unlock the grates
Sometimes, worn-out, alone, he thinks
‘I'm through, I can't last one more week'
but reconsiders when he hears
cheers, clapping, whistles, stamping feet.

by Dave Morrison

"The Club Manager" from Clubland. © Fighting Cock Press, 2011. Reprinted with permission.

First we had the attack on Planned Parenthood funding ... and now the latest thing in the Republican war against women, is a bill proposed by Georgia House Republican Bobby Franklin .. who wants abortion classified as murder, and he wants police to investigate all miscarriages to make sure they were "spontaneous."

So, a woman better be able to prove her miscarriage was natural, or face felony charges ...

Here's the complete bill.

Please remember that Franklin is the same guy who wants rape victims to be called "accusers" .. and he obviously thinks that GA can do whatever it dang well pleases, no matter what the Supreme Court ruled on abortion.

Needless to say, there are no exceptions allowed .. not for rape victims .. not for incest victims .. not to save the life and health of the mother ...

So, whenever a woman had a miscarriage, at home on her bedroom floor or in the hospital, it would have to be reported and a fetal death certificate issued.? And if the reason isn't known, it would have to be investigated? If the woman doesn't know, then the Miscarriage Police would ask family members and friends how it happened? Would hospitals have to keep records of anyone who has a miscarriage and report it?

Are these the same Tea Party right-wingers who protest big government being in everybody's business? And budget deficits? .. how on earth could GA fund this? Especially when, as the article says, 1 in 5 pregnancies end in miscarriage.

Thankfully, this bill has little chance of being passed .. I blog about it only to let you independent and moderate voters see what you get when you vote for Republicans ...

A new diet survey found that 51 percent of women say they would skip sex for a year if it meant they could have the body of their dreams.

Boy, talk about sex starved ...

(CBSNews) Would you give up sex to be thin?

"Fitness magazine asked 2,400 women if they would sacrifice a full year of sex to be skinny -- and 51 percent said yes.

That was just one of the surprising results of the magazine's new diet survey - a survey that underscored the serious self-esteem and body issues many women have today.[..]"

Seriously, isn't sex supposed to be great exercise? Have more sex, burn more calories, get skinnier, voila!

PS - I am a gurl.

I'm tired of hearing left-wingers complain because President Obama hasn't gone to Wisconsin and jumped in the middle of that union-busting mess. Give me a break. How appropriate would it be for a president to go into a state and challenge an elected governor? I mean, as much as I detest Walker, the people in Wisconsin elected him.

.. though who knows why in the world they did. I'm thinking that as soon as the sun shines on what the governor is really trying to do - stiff the state and reward his cronies - as soon as the people see what he is really all about, can recall be far behind?

Because, mark my word, if Gov. Walker's anti-union bill passes, the Koch family, who are hiding behind their piles of tax shelters, will come out of this very wealthy indeed.

He waited for the bartender to close
his gear was packed and stacked beside the door
you can't enjoy the highs without the lows

The gigs were becoming something of a chore
the sameness had anesthetized the dream
til he forgot what he was pushing for

The waitress poured herself a short Jim Beam
he remembered when she fronted her own band
with headphones on she wiped each table clean

He'd left his cigarettes out in the van
he wanted to get paid, go home to sleep
next weekend was another two-night stand

He waited for the bartender to close
you can't enjoy the highs without the lows.

by Dave Morrison

"The Guitar Player" from Clubland. © Fighting Cock Press, 2011. Reprinted with permission.

The Milwaukee Business Times reports that the unions have agreed to all of Gov. Walker's demands on wages and benefits .. IF he'll scrap the provision that would strip them of the right to negotiate in the future. The right to bargain isn't a fiscal issue, it's a union-busting issue.

I noticed a sign in the Wisconsin crowd - "No Longer A Republican" .. maybe some people are finally realizing that they've been voting against their own interests.

The working class voting for corporate-backed Republicans is like chickens voting for KFC.

I wonder how many federal and state employees who realize that their jobs and pay and benefits are suddenly in jeopardy voted Republican?

Maybe non-union Americans are realizing that organized labor is all about protecting the middle class .. period.

Maybe the good people of Wisconsin are realizing that the blame for some problems lies not with bleeding heart Liberals, but with greedy corporatists like the Koch brothers, who are hijacking not only our government, but both of our political parties.

Could this be the beginning of a revolution that might spread nationwide? Could the revolution in Egypt be spreading, not only throughout the Middle East, but to the American working class to wake up and fight for what is rightfully theirs?

Forbes.com has an interesting article - "Koch Brothers Behind Wisconsin Effort To Kill Public Unions"

Please notice - and ponder - that the above is from Forbes .. as in Steve Forbes .. as in rich guy .. as in conservative.

As the attacks on America's working class become more brazen, it'll become more difficult for the right-wing to hide its true intentions ...

Ever since that moment
when it first occurred
to me that I would die
(like everyone on earth!)
I struggled against
this eventuality, but
never thought of
how I'd die, exactly,
until around thirty
I made a mental list:
hit by car, shot
in head by random ricochet,
crushed beneath boulder,
victim of gas explosion,
head banged hard
in fall from ladder,
vaporized in plane crash,
dwindling away with cancer,
and so on. I tried to think
of which I'd take
if given the choice,
and came up time
and again with He died
in his sleep.
Now that I'm officially old,
though deep inside not
old officially or otherwise,
I'm oddly almost cheered
by the thought
that I might find out
in the not too distant future.
Now for lunch.

by Ron Padgett

"The Death Deal" from How Long. © Coffee House Press, 2011. Reprinted with permission.

Republican strategist Karl Rove hasn't been known as a "birther," but he's a dang good conspiracy theorist. He's got this birther controversy all figured out .. says it's just a big liberal trap laid out by Obama to make conservatives look stupid.

Obama please, if it's true, you don't have to try so hard ...

Seriously, Rove was on Bill O'Reilly's show the other night and said it was the Obama administration who cooked up this elaborate "birtherism" plot.

Of course Rove would think this way .. this is exactly the sort of trap he would recommend if he were on Obama's team. One of Rove's White House jobs was to lay political traps .. such as John McCain's fake illegitimate black baby .. such as the GWBush fake National Guard memos, etc., etc.

He knows all about how to delegitimize the opposition.

Read more here at salon.com: "...Karl Rove is smarter than John Boehner, so where Boehner grumbles that it's not his job to tell deeply misinformed people that they've been deeply misinformed, Rove comes out and says birtherism is stupid. ..."

Rove has reason to worry about Republicans looking stupid: "... Fifty-one percent of people who say they're likely to participate in a Republican primary next year are birthers, according to a new poll from Public Policy Polling. ..."

But then, we're talking about people who believe that Ronald Reagan smote down the Soviet Union with only a steely gaze .. and believe the Holy Bible is historical fact .. so, they'll believe just about anything.

Joking aside, this is Rove's way of trying to defuse the birthers by making them think they are being played .. but it won't work, they'll like their conspiracy better because it's more exciting .. not as mental.

You know, Rove might be partially right - Obama didn't start the birther conspiracy, but it's certainly to his advantage to let moderate voters watch Tea Partyers spin themselves deeper into the crazy hole.

Boy, if Wisconsin Gov. Walker and his anti-union Republican cronies thought the pro-labor protesters would slowly fizzle out and go home, they've got another think comin'.

Because the crowds protesting against Walker's union-busting campaign seem to get stronger with each passing day.

I was happy that everything went well yesterday .. because theTea Party activists had been bussed in to protest for the other side - oh the irony, in a fight between working families and government officials, the Tea Party crowd is siding with the government.

Anyway, thank goodness no one got shot, but the pro-Walkers weren't a very big crowd .. even if C-list rightie celebrities like Joe the Plumber showed up.

Almost all of the media reported that the pro-Walker demonstration was outnumbered several times over by the pro-union demonstrators.

Reuters reports: "Both sides drew thousands to the state capital Madison on Saturday -- unofficial estimates put the total near 40,000 -- but opponents appeared to have several times as many as those backed by Tea Party groups, the first appearance by members of the conservative, limited-government movement this week."

The debate remains the same - union leaders continue to point out that they're willing to accept less pay and fewer benefits, as long as they get to keep their collective bargaining rights .. which they won 50 years ago.

Gov. Walker and the Republicans still refuse to even consider the compromise .. and has ruled out any talks.

Surely, Wisconsin Republican lawmakers understand that their re-election is doomed if they vote for this union-busting bill ...

Been reading a lot about Social Security lately .. learned a couple things.

Many people fret that Social Security is teetering on the edge of collapse .. and anyone paying into this "pyramid scheme" today probably won't see a penny of their money after they retire.

Many other people don't agree.

Last week President Obama told a reporter, who had asked about the "crushing costs of Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid," that "Social Security is not the huge contributor to the deficit that the other two entitlements are."

Greg Sargent wrote in the Washington Post that the president probably meant that SS is only a small problem and not a huge contributor to the deficit .. that SS shouldn't be lumped in with Medicare and Medicaid, which do have serious problems because of the rising cost of healthcare itself.

Kevin Drum at Mother Jones magazine, agrees:

"Medicare is a problem .. But unless you believe that the United States is literally going to collapse in the near future, Social Security isn't. Period."

Drum says that if payroll taxes never go up, then by 2040 Social Security benefits will have to be trimmed by about 25 percent. But "one way or another, at some level between 75 percent and 100 percent of what we've promised, Social Security benefits will always be there. This is not a Ponzi scheme. It's not unsustainable."

Many people argue that SS gets lumped in with Medicare and Medicaid because so many politicians don't want to have to pay back the loans they took out of the Social Security Trust fund to pay for other projects .. like tax cuts.

Many people think a few tweaks to the payroll tax could keep SS solvent forever. Drum points out that SS costs about 4.5 percent of GDP. But, as more boomers retire, it will rise about 6 percent of GDP by 2030. A simple solution would be to slowly increase payroll taxes by 1.5 percent of GDP.

Rand Paul and the Tea Party wail that we're all going to die unless we raise the retirement age to 70. Calmer people think we ought to just raise the cap on payroll tax, which seems far more practical and fair.

OR eliminate the cap altogether. That way, these fat cats who get multimillion-dollar bonuses every year would have to pay full Social Security taxes on them .. and their employers who pay them the bonuses would have to pay the full match. Poor babies.

President Obama seems confident he'll be able to tweak "minor adjustments" in the next few years .. but even if he's wrong, Social Security isn't going broke.

I read that over a life time the average couple will pay around $614k into SS and receive around $555k in return. This sounds more like a Ponzi scheme than a Pyramid scheme.

Read more about this here:

www.urban.org/publications/412281.html

www.urban.org/publications/310667.html

www.urban.org/retirees/Estimating-Social-Security.cfm

www.urban.org/publications/901397.html

30,000/40,000 workers are protesting in Madison, Wisconsin, angry that Gov. Scott Walker's anti-union bill will strip benefits and collective bargaining rights from public employees.

And today "they" (Koch Bros.?) are busing Tea Partyers in for a counter protest. I have images of teabags swinging from hats and guns strapped to angry tempers .. what could go wrong? Might as well provide free moonshine.

If Walker were only asking for a temporary reduction in benefits, people wouldn't be so upset .. but he wants to do away with the union forever. I heard him say it with my own ears.

State workers only ask that their bargaining rights not be taken away .. they've already said they understand hard times and are willing to pay more money into their healthcare and retirement funds .. but Walker won't negotiate with them.

Walker deliberately created a crisis so he could take advantage of it to attack his political enemies .. he and the Tea Party are trying to turn Wisconsin into a sleazy one-party dictatorship.

Republicans have one goal and it isn’t balancing the budget. It is to, once and for all, destroy unions .. beginning where they think they can safely make the anti-government rant stick.

What Walker is trying to do in Wisconsin, Gov. Kasich hopes to do in Ohio .. Republican governors across the country are waiting to see how it all plays out.

We Democrats remember that unions created the middle class in our country .. without unions, we'd all be corporate wage slaves. When we had strong unions we had a strong America.

I'm not saying labor unions are perfect .. far from it, in boom times they'd get too big for their britches and ask for too much. But, these Wisconsin workers are willing to renegotiate contracts ...

Guys like Jimmy Hoffa and the mob influence of unions have tainted their reputation .. made lots of people distrust large unions.

These days it's guys like David and Charles Koch who are the bad guys. Gov. Walker and Wisconsin Republicans do their bidding. It doesn't take an Einstein to figure out that uber-rich corporations such as Koch Industries are hell-bent on destroying the labor movement.

Check out Americans For Prosperity, a group who was very high-profile during the recent CPAC meeting .. a group who donates oodles of money to Republican coffers .. a group founded and funded by David Koch.

Gov. Walker is just one soldier in the billionaires' war against labor.

Labor is seen by corporate masters as the last strong line of resistance against the takeover of government (and our tax dollars) by corporations. So .. labor must die. Workers would be at their mercy.

The labor movement is only trying to protect workplace fairness standards that exist for all workers, be they organized or not. The unions have fought for these rights for 50 years .. for child labor laws, the 8 hour day, weekends, overtime, workman's comp, etc., etc.

Which side are you on, working people or corporate bosses?

Well, not everybody is buying it. A new poll - We Ask America - shows that a small majority of Wisconsin residents don't go along with Walker's plans to strip public sector unions of much of their power.

It's still winter,
and still I don't know you
anymore, and you don't know

me. But this morning I stand
in the kitchen with the illusion,
peeling a clementine. Each piece

snaps like the nickname for a girl,
the tinny bite it was
to be one once. Again I count

your daughters and find myself in the middle,
the waist of the hourglass,
endlessly passed through and passed through

but holding nothing, dismayed
by the grubby February sun
I was born under and the cheap pleasure

it gives the window. Yet I raise the shade
for it, and try not to feel it is wrong
to want spring, to be a season

further from you—not wrong to wish
for a hard rain, a hard wind
like one we sat out in together
or came in from together.

by Deborah Garrison

"She Thinks of Him on Her Birthday" from A Working Girl Can't Win and other poems. © Random House, 1998. Reprinted with permission.

Yes, Republicans are funny .. just not in the witty sense, more in the awkward sense. The other night on the Daily Show Jon Stewart made fun of conservatives trying to be funny at their recent CPAC pow wow.

He took a swipe at this group of government-haters, opening with, "But of course, the Middle East isn’t the only place where citizens are calling for an overthrow of the government."

Stewart showed clips of some of the lamer "comedic" moments .. rightie after rightie failed miserably as they tried to "roast" President Obama with weak jokes and poor timing.

Stewart said, "This year it's a roast! Only with Barack Obama as their Pamela Anderson, and Socialism as their 'she was married to someone with a comically large penis."

My favorite was Michele Bachmann: "You may know that the president of China's name is Hu....With all the money we owe to China, I think we might rightly say 'Hu's your daddy?'"

Hardly anyone laughed .. but I did .. and not for the right reasons. Like Jon said, "OK, so now we know how you would tell a joke to kindergarteners or an English-as-a-second-language class ...!"

Then too, if the audience doesn't have a sense of humor in the first place .. I imagined a big red "Laugh" sign lighting up ...

The rightie sense of humor doesn't seem to mature past 5th grade .. they don't have it in them to be humorous without being mean.

I remember Fox News' take-off on the Daily Show .. they called it "The Half Hour News Hour" .. it ran only a few weeks before they yanked it.

One reason is probably because news humor doesn't come through unless one is already well-informed .. if you don't keep up with the news, most of the content goes over your head. And we all know that at Fox News "stuff is just made up." ...

Also, everyone knows that all the really good comedy writers are Liberals.

This all reminds me of my bartending days decades ago .. how I had to put up with old-white-guy drunks and their racist and sexist 'jokes.' Their humor was like this CPAC crowd, not all that funny, and almost always either directly mean or mean spirited.

Here's Stewart's C-Snap video:

http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tue-february-15-2011/c-snap

BTW - I loved how the CPAC crowd heckled and booed the swaggering and arrogant Donald Trump .. now *that* was funny.

"Dick Cheney presented Donald Rumsfeld with a Defender of the Constitution Award. And, yes, the irony was lost on both of them." –Seth Meyers

"The New York Times says new cars will no longer be equipped with cassette players. Come on, it's 2011. People still read newspapers?" –Jimmy Fallon

"President Obama delivered his 2012 budget to Congress, but it probably won't get much action, since they still haven't yet passed a budget for 2011. But to be fair, they have been busy posting shirtless photos of themselves on Craigslist." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Representative Chris Lee was forced to resign after sending a shirtless picture of himself to a woman on Craigslist. On the bright side, he did surprise his wife for Valentines Day." –Conan O'Brien

"A Republican Congressman, Rep. Chris Lee, was caught flirting with a woman trolling for dates on Craigslist and sent her a shirtless photo of himself. He lied about his age and his marital status. He said he was 39 and divorced. He's 46 and married, though being a Republican congressman, I'm guessing he's really 60 and gay." –Bill Maher

"I got to give it up to him. He does look really buff in that picture. In fact, after he resigned he got a call from Barney Frank begging him to stay." –Bill Maher

"It was Egypt's first week without Mubarak. He finally stepped down because of that sexy picture of him on the Internet." –Craig Ferguson

"Facebook is looking into buying Twitter for around $10 billion. If all goes as planned, the company hopes to combine the two companies, creating the biggest waste of time the world has ever seen." –Jay Leno

"Breast feeding activists plan to descend on Washington for a public breast feeding demonstration. Also descending on Washington, thousands of men saying, "What? I'm looking at the baby." –Conan O'Brien

"Former Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak is thinking of moving to Los Angeles. Before you get him a roommate, just know that he's really hard to evict." –Conan O'Brien

"Hosni Mubarak reportedly didn't understand the Internet and social networking. That may be true, but somehow he figured out how to wire $80 billion to Switzerland." –David Letterman

"Egyptian officials say that Hosni Mubarak is going through a 'severe psychological condition.' It's called 'getting dumped a week before Valentine's Day.'" –Jimmy Fallon

"Unfortunately, there's only one job available for an 82-year-old man [photo of Hosni & Kelly Ripa]" –Seth Meyers

"This whole revolution was started by a Facebook page. So Mubarak wasn't so much as deposed as de-friended." –Bill Maher

"For me the great mystery of this whole revolution was that for three weeks, these people were in this square with no bathrooms. How did they go? This will always be known in Egyptian history as the riddle of the sphincter." –Bill Maher

"This is the start of New York's Fashion Week. I just talked with N.Y. Congressman Chris Lee, and the told me shirts are totally out this season. He was married and looking for dates on Craigslist by sending shirtless photos of himself. He listed his marital status as divorced. But in fairness, he's about to be." –Jimmy Fallon

"Egypt's President Mubarak finally resigned. When they heard that a Muslim president stepped down, the Tea Party said, 'Obama's leaving?'" –Jay Leno

"Keith Olbermann has a new job on Al Gore's Current TV as an investigative reporter. His job will be to find anyone that watches Current TV." –Jay Leno

[a tip of the hat to Daniel Kurtzman, NYT-laughlines, and newsmax.com]

CBS reporter Lara Logan was attacked and sexually assaulted in Cairo.  

I had been so encouraged to see women and children participating in the Egyptian revolution .. which seemed on the whole to be peaceful.

But while watching Egyptians celebrate freedom and victory, it's easy to forget that large crowds can have dangerous elements .. considering human nature .. and that sexual harassment is rampant in the Middle East.

Some people say the attackers were government spies targeting foreign media .. others say the attackers thought Logan was a spy .. still others say this is a common occurrence, that attractive western women are fair game because they are considered promiscuous ...

I saw Logan on a couple of reports where the celebrating crowd was jostling her all about .. she handed her cell phone to a couple of men, allowing their voices to be broadcast along with hers. I was uneasy about the scene, worried about her .. thinking it was dangerous to be a woman in a mob of frenzied males .. in a region hard-wired to misogyny.

Thank goodness for the brave Egyptian women and soldiers who rescued her .. she might have been killed. These women showed courage and compassion .. one can only hope that they represent the future of their society.

I don't think people fully comprehend the dangers faced by journalists as they try to cover "groundbreaking" news .. covering revolutions and insurrections is as dangerous as a combat situation.

I remember seeing Lara Logan on the Daily Show .. she matter-of-factly talked about the injuries she got from a roadside IED, how it resulted in partial deafness. I thought, wow, what a courageous journalist to go back out and put herself in harm's way to report the news.

We mustn't let one horrific incident define a whole political movement .. but I must say what happened to Lara Logan will stain my memory of Egypt's revolution.

Sometimes we Americans forget how dangerous some parts of the world can be .. where they only laugh themselves silly at our ideas of gender equality.

Peace to you Lara Logan .. I am so very sorry this happened to you.

And thank you for allowing this information to be released .. by making your experience known, you will help protect your fellow journalists from such future horrors.

Or, how can a simple answer to a simple question speak a thousand words?

Here's the best TV news blooper ever .. but then, this woman looked dead serious .. like she knew exactly what she was saying .. so these two anchors must have some sort of "history."

News reporter Mark Aiston's set up was asking for it .. and co-anchor Belinda Heggen delivered a home run .. make sure you catch the look on the male anchor's face at the 15 second mark. Ba-dum-ching!

See it here:

http://warmingglow.uproxx.com/2011/02/weak

The day is warm and dank as early summer.
Crows scream and pitch in the woods
like the ruckus of old women fighting
for the shreds of their lives.

A sudden silence — then the hum
of a black-winged cloud oozing
through the naked sky —
the ruckus begins again.

Under the layers of winter grey,
the farm is pale and muted, the barn doors
shut tight. The only animals in sight
an earth-brown squirrel and these harbinger birds.

I am waiting for the sun to shine again,
to learn how to unfurl my heart in its warmth.
These days, neither long nor short, bright nor dark,
wet nor dry, fill me with a sadness I cannot name.

Yesterday was Valentine's Day, a day of love
and chocolate. My father, born eighty-one years ago,
always bought red cardboard hearts full of truffles
for my mother, my sister and me. Now he is gone.

This morning, the doctor taps his pencil
against the screen. A six-week ultrasound.
There, that's the heartbeat.
A tiny flutter outlined by grey.

by Ann Campanella

"Mid February" from What Flies Away. © Main Street Rag Publishing Company, 2006. Reprinted with permission.

Not long ago, she said that Sarah Palin was 'beautiful' and had a 'beautiful' family and should stay in 'beautiful' Alaska.

Now she jabs John Boehner for being the Weeper of the House.

Yesterday Barbara and Poppy Bush were being interviewed on the Today Show by granddaughter Jenna, who was asking them about all the love letters they had exchanged over 60 years. Poppy was trying to read one aloud when he got choked up.

Barbara seemed touched, but quipped - "You know what? You could be Speaker of the House."

It's always refreshing to hear the unvarnished truth from someone who obviously is disgusted with the new Republican Party.

It was 1966 and Brando was above the Atlantic Ocean flying from New York to London when he wrote a letter to a flight attendant sitting nearby .. complimenting her on her "gothic aspects." He handed it to her as he got off the plane.

I remember reading a strange story in a Brando biography. He was just starting to hit it big on Broadway .. one night a young woman followed him home and knocked on his apartment door. When he answered she told him she only wanted to wash his feet .. he let her in and provided a wash basin .. after she dried his feet with her hair he took her to bed.

Anyway, here's the letter, © Christie's Images Limited 2011:

"Dear Lady —

There is something not quite definable in your face — something lovely, not pretty in a conventionally thought of way. You have something graceful and tender and feminine (sp). You seem to be a woman who has been loved in her childhood, or else, somehow by the mystery of genetic phenomena you have been visited by the gifts of refinement, dignity and poise. Perhaps you cannot be accredited with all that.

Irrespective of your gothic aspects, you have passed something on in terms of your expression, mien and general comportment that is unusual and rewarding.

It's been a pleasant if brief encounter and I wish you well and I hope we shall have occasion to cross eyes again sometime.

Best wishes

Marlon Brando

Savoy"

.. is a good example of how Republicans govern.

The ink had no more dried on President Obama's budget proposal when righties Sen. Jim DeMint (R-S.C.), and Rep. Mike Pence (R-Ind.) issued statements condemning it .. saying the White House's budget "would push us over the edge into generational debt" .. and it would "not get the debt or deficit under control."

I swear, it just doesn’t matter what the issue is – read the bill, don’t read the bill, deficits matter, deficits don’t matter, etc, etc – whatever Obama says the righties always say the exact opposite.

But then they’ve crowed loud and clear that this is their mission .. to cause him to fail.

How on earth could DeMint and Pence comment on the Obama budget so soon? Have they read the entire plan?

I remember Republicans shouting at Democrats to READ THE BILL!

So, I guess only Democrats are required to read proposals and bills in their entirety .. Republicans don’t have to do such things.

Or maybe it they've been too busy trying to convert Yankee dollars into Confederate money. Let's see .. take 1.1 Trillion Yankee dollars and convert that by multiplying .. oh, dear how many Confederate dollars to a penny ...?

"The Dark Origins Of Valentine's Day ... a time to celebrate romance and love and kissy-face ...But the origins of this festival of candy and cupids are actually dark, bloody ....

From Feb. 13 to 15, the Romans celebrated the feast of Lupercalia. The men sacrificed a goat and a dog, then whipped women with the hides of the animals they had just slain.

The Roman romantics "were drunk. They were naked," says Noel Lenski, a historian ... Young women would actually line up for the men to hit them, Lenski says. They believed this would make them fertile. ..."

Doesn't seem to me that getting whipped with soft animal skins is all that bad.

These days a woman could earn a good living from that when CPAC is in town ... ;D

"WINNIPEG — It looks like people with herpes have a better chance at love than those who smoke.

A Winnipeg-based matchmaking service has added a division to their company that specializes in matching people with genital herpes -- but no longer works with smokers.

"As of a year ago, we stopped accepting clients who smoke, because time after time when we were attempting to match (them), their files would be rejected," said Lianne Tregobov ...[..]"

Well, they get points for honesty and we can joke, but I see nothing wrong with this .. better than having the condition and lying about it.

That's what South Carolina state Sen. Lee Bright (R) says .. and he has introduced legislation that would create a new state currency.

I swear, more lingering resentment from the South losing the Civil War .. they're probably pissed because black people are driving luxury automobiles .. or living in the White House.

You can't tell me that their resentment stems from losing their heritage or a genteel way of life .. we fought the Civil War, and lost 618,000 Americans, to settle the question of whether or not a man had the right to own another human being.

South Carolina seceded twice, in 1832 and 1860 .. I don't give a dang if we let them go today .. the treasonous bastards. Coin your own money, pass your own laws, you're on your own.

While we're at it, the union should demand reparations in the international courts for building their infrastructure .. maybe they'll change their minds when they get the bill for Interstate 95 ...

And when they want back in, it's on our terms .. maybe we'll name them North Georgia.

The treasonous bastards are not just in SC .. gold only standard in GA .. more succession talk in TX .. Mississippi wants a license plate to honor a KKK leader .. the deep South can't seem to take the Confederate battle flags off their state flags, etc., etc.

Read about Sen. Not-so-Bright here in the Spartanburg Herald-Journal: "Continuing a pattern of attempts to assert South Carolina's independence from the federal government, State Sen. Lee Bright, R-Roebuck, has introduced legislation that backs the creation of a new state currency that could protect the financial stability of the Palmetto State in the event of a breakdown of the Federal Reserve System.[..]"

Back in 1860, a South Carolina legislator said that South Carolina is too small to be a country and too big to be a lunatic asylum.

It's still true today.

Mysterious infection strikes Playboy Mansion .. no, not STD Of The Month.

Nobody is really surprised that dozens of people came down with something after visiting Hef's man cave .. only this infection causes respiratory problems, flu-like symptoms, and pneumonia.

The Los Angeles health department is investigating.

They're thinking maybe it's a milder form of Legionnaires’ disease .. which is caused by bacteria growing in warm water—like hot tubs, or the fog machine at the conference. "The bacteria are not spread from person to person, according to the CDC, but are instead inhaled in water vapor."

Read about it at Los Angeles Times.

Oh boy are the late-night comedians gonna have fun with this.

Poll shows that the more Charlie Sheen parties the more his image improves.

What does it say about us as a society when, not only do we stand by and watch someone slowly kill themselves through drug and alcohol abuse, but actually support it and apparently admire it?

Will they think it's so cute if he pleasures himself to death .. maybe takes someone along with him?

BTW - why doesn't the attitude of 'celebrities just want to have fun' wash over onto Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton or Britney Spears? But no, the public shuns them. Double standard, eh?

(Reuters) - Reports of heavy drinking, drug use, porn stars. None of that should be good for a Hollywood celebrity -- unless that star is Charlie Sheen.

Sheen's drinking and drug problems may have caused a temporary shutdown on his "Two and A Half Men" TV comedy, but some of his fans think even more highly of him now than before, according to a survey released on Wednesday by show business newspaper, The Hollywood Reporter....[..]"

I heard Sheen on the radio telling members of UCLA's baseball team: "Stay off the crack. Drink chocolate milk. Enjoy your moment. That's all I've got." They cheered and applauded.

A great role model for the nation's youth. Yes, it's his private life .. until he can't keep it private. I lost all respect for party boy when he was arrested for domestic violence.

Someone said a briefcase full of cocaine is nature's way of saying you have too much money.

Robert Downey Jr. finally snapped to and cleaned up .. after almost ruining his career. I respect that he was brave enough to salvage his life .. he could be one of our greatest actors.

I don't see Sheen as all that talented .. he just plays himself on his TV show.

"AMES, Iowa - Noted Midwestern raconteur Omer L. Baumgartner passed away ...He was 90 years old. ... lived a long and passionate life dedicated to rambunctious performances and dairy products. ... attending hundreds of county and state fairs, showing and selling cattle, frying oysters, skinning rabbits, and drinking whiskey. ....

Baumgartner attained the rank of captain ... running mess halls feeding over 5,000 in Tennessee and Alabama for the Army Air Corps. He was wildly popular with the troops for his mess hours bongo drum performances accompanied by dancing girls. ....

Baumgartner disliked vegetables his whole life. Despite consuming more than 2,000 pounds of butter, he never suffered from any kind of heart disease. His last meal was ice cream. ...."

What a guy .. wish I could have known him. I'd like my life to be as full as Omer's .. and my obit as fun to read.

You men will want to give this new invention a standing ovation. You'll think the Clap-Off Bra is the most important scientific breakthrough since the polio vaccine. No more Harry High School fumbling with those dang hooks.

The red and black one is very pretty .. but, in order for it to work you first have to get a woman to wear one .. it might be fun in private, but no woman would want to risk the bra coming off at random places in public.

"....On a quiet morning, two years ago, I first set out to make a clap off bra .... After a long arduous process, I am finally proud present to you a reliably working prototype...."

http://www.instructables.com/id/Clap-Off-Bra/

An important lesson from the Egyptian revolution - not all Arabs are suicide bombing fanatics. Egyptians have shown the power of nonviolence and civil disobedience. The protesters in Cairo were accountants, teachers, doctors, students .. just like us.

We in the West have been acclimated, brainwashed even, to view Arabs, especially the men, as dangerous and violent .. the more ignorant among us call them "rag heads." We fed into our 9/11 fear, and took away working class Arab humanity and dignity.

There are millions of Arabs who are just like you and me, they want democracy, freedom and dignity .. a job so they can care for their families. They are no different from Lady Liberty’s "tired, huddled masses yearning to breathe free."

Many American seem surprised that their stereotypes about Arabs are wrong.

I heard more than one American (and not the intellectual shut-ins) remark about how educated and articulate Egyptians are, how many languages they speak. Well hey, they do have a 5,000 year old cosmopolitan civilization.

The majority of us have just not been paying attention to Egypt .. we're too concerned about what some moronic radical Imam said .. or something Sarah Palin said.

That's what Rachel Maddow called the Egyptian revolution, also, "It is a dangerous moment, it is a beautiful moment, but the world will never be the same."

I agree, when they learned that Hosni Mubarak had fled Cairo, the Egyptian people roared with the same euphoria, danced in the streets with the same jubilation as the East Germans did the night they tore down the Berlin Wall.

And the Egyptians did it without a '2nd Amendment' .. millions of unarmed men, women and children brought down a powerful corrupt dictator in 18 days. Is this why our American Right is not cheering very loudly for this great democratic movement?

Of course, we have not reached the end of this history lesson .. to want the next few phases of liberation to run as smoothly would be too much to expect. Egypt has been an inspiration, whatever lies ahead.

Some people in the West are uneasy that power has been handed to Egypt's Supreme Military Council .. even on a temporary basis. But the Egyptian people seem okay with it, they respect the military .. maybe because it's a conscript army made up of their sons and brothers, and is rotated every few years so that almost all young men serve.

Remember - the army kept the peace and refused to fire on their own people. If the top brass gets greedy, the lower ranks out number them.

Many fear a repeat of what happened in Iran - a revolution that was hijacked by Islamist theocrats. Egyptian People Power would probably fight that. They are brave and determined - remember that thousands were wounded or "disappeared" .. 300 are dead.

The revolutionaries have opened the door to change .. and now we in the West have to hold our breath and keep our fingers crossed about what happens next. We are on their side, cheering them on.

One thing for sure - no one put up a banner that says, ‘Mission Accomplished.’

How about going from 31 degrees below zero (no, not wind chill) to 70 plus degrees within a week?

In Oklahoma we joke about the weather - "the only state in the union where you can stand in mud up to your knees and have dust blow in your eyes" .. or we sing, "Oooooo-kla-homa where the wind blows the paint right off your car..." .. or "It's so hot I saw a funeral procession pull into a Dairy Queen" .. but we have no jokes about the snow because we go several years without seeing any. So we are absolutely gob smacked about what's happened recently:

".....Nowata, Okla., recorded 31 degrees below zero — setting a new record low for the state. The previous lowest temperature in Oklahoma history was 27 below in 1930 and 1905, said Gary McManus, associate state climatologist with the Oklahoma Climatological Survey. ... McManus said temperatures in Oklahoma should rise to the 60s over the weekend and the 70s next week...."

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/41507564/ns/weather/

How 'bout - It was so cold that Brett Favre was texting pictures of his chestnuts roasting over an open fire. Ba-dum-ching!

"Keith Olbermann has a new show on Al Gore’s new network. I’m not saying the audience is small, but he begins his show with, Good evening, Al." –Jay Leno

"The Catholic Church has approved a new app that lets you make confessions over your iPhone. It also raises the possibility of accidentally butt-dialing God." –Conan O'Brien

"Michelle Obama says her husband, President Obama, has quit smoking. Fox News reported this as 'Obama Destroying the Tobacco Industry.'" –Craig Ferguson

"Russian astronomers say an asteroid is heading toward our planet and will hit us in 2036. You have to keep in mind that Russian astronomers use empty vodka bottles for telescopes." –Craig Ferguson

"President Obama had lunch with Republican leaders at the White House today and had to do without salt, pepper and butter. Not for dietary reasons. The Republicans refused to pass anything." –Jay Leno

"The Catholic Church has approved an app that let’s you confess on your iPhone. You can now cheat and atone right on the same device. Perfect for Brett Favre." –Jay Leno

"The actual name for this app is "Priest in your pocket." Don’t they read the paper? Couldn’t they come up with a better name?" –Jay Leno

"The demonstrations are getting bigger in Cairo. The Egyptian government tried to disperse the crowd with tear gas, and when that didn’t work, a Black Eyed Peas halftime show." -Conan O'Brien

"A California man is suing Disney because he was trapped on the 'It’s a Small World' ride for 40 minutes. When they heard it, the Chilean miners said, 'Wow, we got off easy.'" –Conan O'Brien

"Michelle Obama says she has gotten President Obama to stop smoking. Now, maybe she can get John Boehner to stop sobbing." –David Letterman

"G.I. Joe was created on this day in 1964, so tonight G.I. Joe’s going out with Ken to celebrate his birthday and the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell." –Craig Ferguson

"Vice presidents love technology: Joe Biden with the trains, Al Gore with the Internet, and Dick Cheney with the electric torture clamps." –Craig Ferguson

"Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak is the richest man in the world, with more than $70 billion in hidden assets. That will go up even more once his unemployment kicks in." –Jimmy Fallon

"Prince William’s nightclub owner friend is said to be planning a wild bachelor party. It must be weird stuffing a bill in a stripper’s g-string when it has a picture of your grandmother on it." –Jimmy Fallon

"Washington, D.C. is updating its traffic cameras to enforce traffic laws. How about enforcing bribery and corruption laws?" –Jay Leno

"There was a power outage at Newark Airport. Who wants a TSA pat-down with the lights off?" –Jay Leno

"The head of Homeland Security told people at the game, if they saw anything not right give them a call. They got 50 million calls as soon as Christina Aguilera started singing the National Anthem. The good news, you can’t accuse her of lip syncing." –Jay Leno

"Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak told ABC news that he would like to step down from power immediately, but if he did, it could cause chaos in his country. Well, you would hate to see that happen." –Jay Leno

"Over the weekend Dick Cheney declared Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak a good friend. Mubarak said, 'Dude, that's not really helping.'" –Conan O'Brien

"During his interview with President Obama, Bill O'Reilly asked him to explain how he deals with so many people hating him. In response, Obama said, 'You first.'" –Jimmy Fallon

"This year's Super Bowl was the most-watched event in history. Take that, moon landing." –Craig Ferguson

"Do you know where Osama bin Laden watched the Super Bowl? In his man cave." –Jay Leno

"I mean Rush Limbaugh makes a crack about this every week, because who better to get your health advice from than a drug addicted fat man. Rush, I have proof that no one in the government is forcing YOU to eat right and exercise!" —Bill Maher on Limbaugh's criticisms of Michelle Obama's anti-obesity campaign

[a tip of the hat to Daniel Kurtzman, NYT-laughlines, and newsmax.com]

The South lost the Civil War war almost 150 years ago .. and still they nurse their wounded pride. Far from dying out, the Klan is becoming more and more bold.

"Mississippi group proposes license plate to honor KKK leader"

"African-American leaders have reacted with shock at a plan to feature an early Ku Klux Klan leader on Mississippi license plates.

The proposal by the Mississippi Division of Sons of Confederate Veterans (SCV) asked that the state issue a series of license plates between now and 2015 to honor the 150th anniversary of the Civil War.

A 2014 plate would feature Confederate Gen. Nathan Bedford Forrest, who became an important leader of the Klan after the war.

Forrest was most known for directing a massacre of black Union soldiers who had already laid down their arms at Fort Pillow in April 1864.

"It is in connection with one of the most atrocious and cold-blooded massacres that ever disgraced civilized warfare that his name will for ever be inseparably associated," according to an obituary published in The New York Times at his death in 1877. ...

"The news of the massacre aroused the whole country to a paroxysm of horror and fury," the Times added.

Following the war, Forrest worked to bring disparate Klan groups under a centralized authority. He was eventually elected Grand Wizard. ...

"I am not an enemy of the negro," Forrest was quoted as saying. "We want him here among us; he is the only laboring class we have.""

Yep, just the kind of Real American that we want to celebrate today ...

Just goes to show you how deeply tribalism and pecking order are hard-wired into human brains .. so it's a dang miracle that we elected as president a mixed-race, dark-skinned, ethnic male whose grandfather herded goats in Kenya and whose father was a Muslim.

A dang miracle.

Sure we have free speech, but the South lost the war .. how long are they going to fly their confederate flags?

Hell, after Germany lost the war, Nazi symbols and memorabilia were verboten.

Symbolism is a powerful tool .. to ignore its insidious consequences could allow some of the more hateful things that have occurred in our past to seep back into our souls.

Daily I fall in love with mechanics
with their smudged coveralls and names embroidered
over where their hearts just might be
PETE STEWART RAY CHUCK BUTCH
and thick soled boots.
I love how they jack up my car
and press the pneumatic drill
to my tires and with hip
press lean into the whir of liberation
nuts and bolts falling
released from so much spinning
and holding everything tight in place.
I feel their hands
roughened by spark plugs and washer fluid
yet sweetened by overflowing oil pans
slide over me.
Their arms and shoulders
remind me of deep river valleys
and other places where we could tumble
after setting the parking brake...
fumbling and clutching so melodiously
I am left grateful for their engine knowledge.
Daily I fall in love with mechanics
with their grease smudged bad boy grins
and come hither wide opening garage doors.
They tell secrets in the pit
and I want them.
I know them.
They slip belts back into place
their legs diesel dark

They have lovers or spouses or children
or all.
They are strut bearing reliable—
they know how timing belts twist.
Their toothpick punctuated grins
reassure you they are giving you the best
deal in town and they would not let you drive
without checking all your fluid levels.
Daily I fall in love with mechanics.
They are better than Free Air
want my vehicle to be safe and sound
but they never travel far enough
before pulling the next car into the station.

by Susan Thurston

"Daily I Fall in Love with Mechanics" © Susan Thurston. Reprinted with permission of the author.

At last year's CPAC, when Cheney was introduced he was cheered like a rock star .. they cheered this year too .. but it was mostly to drown out the hecklers. Tina Turner's "Simply the Best" was playing in the background when he sauntered on stage to introduce his old pal Donald Rumsfeld .. but suddenly there were shouts of "War criminal!" .. "Where's Bin Laden?" .. "Traitor! Killer!"

No, not by Moonbat Lefty Loons .. but by his own fellow conservatives!

Watching it on C-SPAN, it was hard to tell which one they were heckling .. Cheney and Rummy both being architects of the Iraq war.

Someone yelled "draft dodger!" .. the pro-Cheney/Rummy gang started shouting them down with the "USA! USA!" chant.

Cheney said, "All right, sit down and shut up."

This morning's papers say it was Ron Paul supporters who turned a happy moment into a shouting match .. a lot of them got up and walked out en masse .. the ones who stayed to heckle were shown the door.

Apparently they were aggravated because Cheney was giving Rummy the "Defender Of The Constitution" award. Oh the irony ...

Of course it tickles this Democrat .. because you have to wonder how all these different factions of the Republican Party - classic old school, loony Tea Party and fusty Libertarians - are going to come together to choose a leader. They'd better be able to put aside their ideological differences and choose someone who can beat President Obama .. who is Simply the Best.

Read about it here at Raw Story and see the video.

This time it's Fox News contributor Bill Kristol and Fox News crazy Glenn Beck.

Kristol wrote the truth about Beck's hysterical reaction to the Egyptian protests. Beck had been preaching that "the forces of evil were linking arms" .. I think liberals and the Muslim Brotherhood were two.

Anyway, Kristol wrote in his column that Beck was "marginalizing himself" through his "hysteria":

"Now, people are more than entitled to their own opinions of how best to accomplish that democratic end. And it's a sign of health that a political and intellectual movement does not respond to a complicated set of developments with one voice.

But hysteria is not a sign of health. When Glenn Beck rants about the caliphate taking over the Middle East from Morocco to the Philippines, and lists (invents?) the connections between caliphate-promoters and the American left, he brings to mind no one so much as Robert Welch and the John Birch Society. He's marginalizing himself, just as his predecessors did back in the early 1960s. [The Weekly Standard, 2/14/11]

Whoa, pretty harsh for Kristol, who has his own corner in the crazy closet - remember, he was the one who touted Sarah Palin as John McCain's VP - but he nailed the John Birch Society reference.

Of course, Beck started whining and took to his radio show to mock Kristol .. said that Kristol's kind of thinking is what got us into the Egyptian mess in the first place .. that Kristol doesn't stand for anything anymore, that he only cares about power and keeping his "little fiefdom together" .. yada yada yada.

Read more here:

http://mediamatters.org/mmtv/201102070023

Beck's fear-mongering may fool some - like frightened old people and shut-ins who haven't read a newspaper in 20 years - but his ratings are falling, and he recently lost two major radio stations.

So, maybe more people are catching on to his Chicken Little Scam .. which always segues from warnings about dollar devaluation into TV ads for converting your savings into gold coins through his sponsor Goldline (being investigated last I heard) .. and all kinds of survivalist crap available on his website.

Yes, survivalist crap .. see how important it is to Beck's bank account to keep fueling End Times paranoia .. soon even his most slack-jawed viewers are going to put 2 and 2 together ...

Daily I fall in love with waitresses
with their white bouncing name tags
KATHY MARGIE HONEY SUE
and white rubber shoes.
I love how they bend over tables
pouring coffee.
Their perky breasts hover above potatoes
like jets coming in to LAX
hang above the suburbs—
shards of broken stars.
I feel their fingers
roughened by cube steaks softened with grease
slide over me.
Their hands and lean long bodies
keep moving so...
fumbling and clattering so harmoniously
that I am left overwhelmed, quivering.
Daily I fall in love with waitresses
with their cream-cheese cool.
They tell secrets in the kitchen
and I want them.
I know them.
They press buttons creases burgers buns—
their legs are menu smooth.

They have boyfriends or husbands or children
or all.
They are french dressing worldly—
they know how ice cubes clink.
Their chipped teeth form chipped beef
and muffin syllabics.
Daily I fall in love with waitresses.
They are Thousand Island dreams
but they never stand still long enough
as they serve serve serve.

by Elliot Fried

"Daily I Fall In Love With Waitresses," by Elliot Fried, from Marvel Mystery Oil. © Red Wind Books, 1991. Reprinted with permission.

This may be the first intelligent thing Sarah Palin ever said - her comment about her fellow Republican, Rick Santorum:

"I will not call him the knuckle-dragging Neanderthal. I'll let his wife call him that instead."

Hey, does this mean Palin believes in evolution?

Palin clearly took offense at what Santorum said about why she's not attending the big rightie presidential hopefuls cattle call, CPAC -- because she's busy with "business opportunities" (speaking fees) .. I'm guessing it's a dig about CPAC not paying for speeches.

Read about it here:

http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0211/49213.html

Then Santorum walked it back a little .. went on Fox News and told Greta Van Susteren that his comments were overblown .. and added something about Palin being busy as a mom.

Ever notice that the only time Palin seems to be able to form coherent thoughts is when she's bad-mouthing someone?

Thank you, Sarah, keep speaking, keep showing up even if it is only on Fox, keep your pretty self out there .. because you define the Republican party .. intellectually incurious, mean-spirited and not fit for national office.

For the first time in my life, I agree with Santorum .. I've been saying this since she first got a whiff of fame and the limelight. She'll ride the celebrity wave until it falls flat .. when people figure out that she's only in it for the money, the money will dry up and she'll go away. I predict by 2013.

The Wall Street Journal has a fun piece called "Working Stiffs" .. about actors who play corpses on TV.

""Corpses, hold your breath…and, Action!" the director yelled. I had been slumped in an office chair on a Hollywood set for hours, covered in a gooey mix of corn syrup and medical latex made to look like a messy chest wound. [..]"

Yes, they have to audition, but they don't need experience .. they might be asked to "lie on a sofa and demonstrate the short breaths required [of a corpse] on camera."

Try it - I did - it's not easy. Sometimes they have to be on camera for a long time .. think of having to keep your eyes open and unfocused. Gad, think of the autopsy table .. not blinking as they poke around on you.

Corpse actors are paid the SAG rate for nonspeaking parts - $139 for an eight-hour day, plus overtime .. but they "make an additional $100 or so for wardrobe fittings and posing for still pictures of the victim in happier days, that is, while still living," plus "extensive makeup or getting wet (which according to a SAG spokeswoman includes being "dumped in the East River") earns an actor an additional $14 or $18 per day."

Most actors who do "corpse duty" think it's demeaning and they don't even put it on their resume .. but hey, it probably beats waiting tables or tending bar. And you get all the free food you want. SAG is a very good union.

Republican sex scandals usually involve soliciting men in public restrooms or paying hookers to dress them up in diapers .. so this guy sending silly topless pictures of himself over the Internet is tame .. but still funny. That photo is hilarious.

Okay, I know that sex scandals aren't partisan - but the hypocritical family values-based attacks by right-wingers most certainly are partisan.

Just a few hours ago gawker.com reported: "Rep. Christopher Lee is a married Republican congressman serving the 26th District of New York. But when he trolls Craigslist's "Women Seeking Men" forum, he's Christopher Lee, "divorced" "lobbyist" and "fit fun classy guy."

....The shirtless photo—which, according to metadata contained in the picture, was taken in Washington, D.C.—-was taken with a Blackberry, the same mobile device that Lee uses, which means the hacker would have also accessed the photos on Lee's phone. (And he'd still be the kind of guy who takes cellphone pictures of himself topless.) "

And now he's gone .. it was the fastest-moving sex scandal ever. Rep. Lee just announced that he is resigning from the US House of Representatives "effective immediately."

Republicans are learning how to handle their sex scandals - don't let the culprits drag it out a la Sen. Craig .. make a clean cut so quickly that the late-night comedians won't know what just flew by.

But what tickles me is - A couple of years ago, Rep. Lee wrote a piece warning constituents about Internet safety:

"[R]esponding to what may seem like a friendly e-mail or an appealing marketing offer can have serious consequences ... Private information and images can so easily be transmitted to friends and strangers alike."

Talking about Bill O'Reilly's disrespectful pre-Super Bowl interview with President Obama. The Fox News host frequently talked over the president and butted in .. and then had the nerve to ask Obama how he felt about being hated by the American people. Obama should've said, "Right back atcha, Bill."

Bill-O was so disruptive .. I wanted to yell, "Let the man talk, I want to hear what he’s saying!" I have never seen them do this to any other president.

Ah well, the president handled it all with humor and grace, and came out on top, both Dems and Repubs say so .. he was relaxed and confident, wasn't afraid to face a news network he once described as "entirely devoted to attacking my administration.’’

Bill-O seemed nervous, sitting on the very edge of his seat, and came off foolish as he tried for a gotcha. Somebody counted the number of times that he interrupted the President - it was a total of 48 times. See for yourself:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDdM1q6qOfU

The latenight comedians are having a ball with it. Here's Jimmy Kimmel's "Kimmel Kartoon" from last night .. he set the "conversation" to a Smurfs cartoon:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y64gknQX7rE

On the one hand, you have Democrats talking about building a modern high-speed rail system, which will quickly create thousands of jobs, which will attract dozens of foreign rail manufactures to relocate to the US, which will revitalize our steel industry, which will improve transport between big cities, which will enable the US to keep up with Japan and China and lead the world in the 21st century .. did I mention creating jobs and revitalizing our steel industry?

Then, on the other hand, you have the Republicans talking about abortion.

No kidding .. they've introduced several bills .. they want to redefine the term rape for example, and here's more:

H.R. 3: No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion Act

H.R. 217: Title X Abortion Provider Prohibition Act

H.R. 358: Protect Life Act

HOUSE BILL NO. HB0118 - Abortion-available information for decision. This one was defeated.

HOUSE BILL NO. HB0251 - Abortion-ultrasound information. This is the new one.

All introduced by male GOP representatives ... ahem.

This is the smaller federal government that Republicans say they strive for .. they want to make abortion illegal .. which will expand government because who is going to monitor every single pregnancy .. who is going to ride herd on all those wanton vaginas?

Even though the 100th birthday of a dead President should be an appropriate time to assess his legacy, I didn't want to diss Saint Ronald during his birthday memorials .. so, I waited a little to share my opinion of his presidency.

I say presidency because he seemed like a nice enough guy personally .. though I could never shake the feeling that he was always just playing a role .. sometimes in private as well as in the Oval Office.

Because his kids have said they sort of felt the same way .. there was never a very deep connection. He smiled, joked and said all the right words .. but the only one he was genuinely close to was Nancy. His kids said, "There was them, and then there was us."

I have several reasons why I don't think Republicans should try to put Reagan on Mount Rushmore .. yep, and they want to put his face on our money too ...

I lived in SoCal when he was elected governor. I'll never forget that he was sworn in a few minutes past midnight because Nancy's astrologer said was the most auspicious time. Great, I thought, fits right in with CA's nuttiness.

I remember that Reagan was the reason that so many mentally ill people were 'homeless' and roaming the streets .. because he cut back on state aid to mental hospitals and they started closing down.

He demonized the poor. I saw with my own eyes the results of his cutting back on aid to the needy. I lived down the street from a single working mom who had to give up her child's wheelchair because the state would no longer help her with it.

But, being a trickle down Republican, Reagan had no trouble helping the rich with tax breaks and such ...

The main thing conservatives like to brag about is how he won the Cold War. But many experts say the Soviet Union would've crumbled anyway, because communism was no longer working, its political and economic system was collapsing. So, it didn't have much to do with Reagan's policies.

But he did look the part of a powerful world leader when he told Gorbachev, "Tear down this wall!" .. a historic moment. After all, Reagan was a product of the entertainment industry, he knew how to grab an audience. And yes, that performance was good for the country, and the world to see.

No matter how much Republicans crow about him, under Reagan America went from being the world's leading creditor to its heaviest debtor. And he did raise taxes I don't care what the Republicans say .. he raised taxes seven out of the eight years he was in office.

During his first term, he raised taxes when unemployment was nearing 11 percent -- dang, imagine if Obama tried that today.

I remember how Reagan courted and legitimized the nutty religious right .. who soon became an aggressive arm of the Republican party, and still affects American politics today.

I remember that Reagan was the one who started using the term liberal as a dirty word.

Reagan's mantra became - "Get the government off of people's backs!" He got deregulating fever .. scrapped important rules for the airlines, and before you knew it planes started falling out of the sky with defective parts.

Reagan sold arms to Iran through Israel for the release of American hostages, then said he didn't. His illegal dealings with Nicaraguan Contras are well documented .. he either lied to us about all this, or wasn't privy to what his administration was doing.

There's so much about his terms in office that upset me -- his attitude towards AIDS for example. A concerned man would have offered leadership .. a compassionate man would have offered sympathy .. but, as thousands of people died, Reagan did neither.

To sum up his presidency - He was an actor and other people were writing the script .. *they* are the ones we should be exposing.

His handlers marketed him like toothpaste and he just looked so danged presidential. He was a great maker of illusions because he'd had good teachers in Hollywood.

I always loved what Louis B. Mayer said when he heard Reagan was running for governor of California - "No, Spencer Tracy for governor - Ronald Reagan for his best friend!"

To end on an up note - Reagan wasn't afraid to talk to our enemies .. he treated illegal immigrants as human beings .. and he wrote the most beautiful love letters to Nancy.

"According to 'The National Enquirer' House Speaker John Boehner had his package stimulated. He’s being accused of having two affairs, one with a female lobbyist. That should end the criticism of the Republicans as 'The Party of No.'" –Jay Leno

"Sunday is the 100th birthday of Ronald Reagan, and all over America, Republicans are going to celebrate this by throwing big parties and leaving the bill for Democrats to pay." –Bill Maher

"All of the Arab potentates and their fat cat entourages are on the run. Tunisia's president is leaving, Mubarak is not going to run for re-election, the guy in Yemen is going to leave. This is great news -- not necessarily for the Middle East, but for real estate agents in Beverly Hills." –Bill Maher

"President Obama invited John McCain to the White House to give his opinion on Egypt, specifically what it's like to be a mummy." –Bill Maher

"Now Egyptians are demanding to see President Mubarak’s birth certificate. There’s a rumor he was born in New Jersey." –Jay Leno

"Oil companies are now saying that the unrest in the Middle East could lead to an increase in gas prices. Did you ever notice that everything leads to increased gas prices: Egypt, the snowstorm, Snooki's book, the 'American Idol' judges." –Jay Leno

"Egyptian President Mubarak’s son Gamal will not run for President. Why would he? An unpopular President is removed from office and his inexperienced son is voted in? That could never happen." –Jimmy Fallon

"Egyptian President Mubarak said President Obama doesn’t understand Egyptian culture. Man, get off your high camel." –Jimmy Fallon

"Joe Lieberman is writing a book about the Jewish Sabbath called "Gift of Rest." I hear he’s been working on it 24/6." –Jimmy Fallon

"Mitt Romney said in an interview that Sarah Palin would be great as president. He then added, " . . . of Egypt." –Jimmy Fallon

"After the big snowstorm in Chicago, Mayoral candidate Rahm Emanuel has been pitching in digging stranded cars out of the snow. Of course he didn’t help his campaign by telling people, 'Thank God I don’t live here.'" –Conan O'Brien

"Hosni's son Gamal Mubarak says he does not want to become President, which is just as well. If you've seen one Mubarak you’ve seen Gamal." –Conan O'Brien

"This is day three of the storm that has snowbliterated the United States. Finally America's extra layer of fat comes in handy. Take that, Michelle Obama." –Jimmy Kimmel

"A zoo in Britain has a gorilla that walks upright. Not only that, but he texts while he’s doing it. I heard about this. Within ten minutes we had fifty jokes, all with the same punch line. Arnold Schwarzenegger." –David Letterman

"The owners of Chick-fil-A restaurants were very anti-gay-marriage, but now they’ve reversed their stand, In fact, today they introduced the Chick-on-Chick-fil-A." –Jay Leno

"While in Egypt, CNN’s Anderson Cooper was attacked and beaten, which raises 2 questions. Is it safe to send our media into these places? And how do we get Glenn Beck over there?" –Conan O'Brien

"Anderson Cooper from CNN was there (in Egypt), and he got punched 10 different times. And I thought, well, wait a minute, that happens to me walking to work every day (here in New York)." –David Letterman

"Apparently something is going on over in Egypt. Anderson Cooper and his crew got attacked by pro-government forces. He got hit in the head about 10 times, and I think he got kicked in the Mini Cooper too." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Alright, Hosni. Now you've gone too far. Hands off Anderson Cooper. There is not to be a silvery wisp out of place on that man's glorious head." –Jon Stewart

"The big rumor: Sarah Palin said she may run for president. I understand there's an opening in Egypt." –Jay Leno

"President Mubarak came out of the presidential palace today and saw his shadow; six more weeks of rock throwing." –Jay Leno

"The good news is that Hosni Mubarak may step down. The bad news is that he may be replaced by his idiot son Hosni W. Mubarak." –David Letterman

"Astronomers say that 8 years from today an asteroid has a 1 in 200,000 chance of hitting Earth. About the same chance Sarah Palin has of becoming President, so it’s pretty scary either way." –Jay Leno

[a tip of the hat to Daniel Kurtzman, NYT-laughlines, and newsmax.com]

Congrats Packers! I don't know a dang thing about football - it's like a chess ballet of bone and muscle - but I did like that the Super Bowl came down to two symbols of the working class - meat packers and steel workers .. also that the Packers are owned by the fans. Everyone seemed to think the game was mediocre until the fourth quarter.

Watching football makes me nervous .. all those direct slams to the head. People talk about how much more violent the game is getting .. how so-and-so had to sit out some games because of a concussion.

Thank goodness my games, baseball and golf, are somewhat tamer.

Anyway, my favorite Super Bowl thing is half-time entertainment and the TV ads.

The entertainment wasn't all that this year .. I like the Black-eyed Peas well enough .. but descending on wires and glow-stick dancers just didn't do it for me .. maybe I'm becoming jaded. There was better music in the commercials -- Elton John, David Bowie.

Poor Christina Aguilera forgot the words to the national anthem .. I hope it was more nerves than ignorance. It's all over the news today .. but that's okay, everybody knows who she is now .. just spell her name right.

I'll scream if I see Cameron Diaz stuff popcorn in A-Rod's mouth one more time ...

The TV ads are usually Boobs, Chips, and Beer .. but I loved the one of the kid in the Darth Vader costume .. liked the Dorito ads, the dog one was the best, the finger-sucking one was gross, I may never eat Doritos again.

Apparently hitting people in the head with beverage cans is all the rage this year .. the Pepsi one of the abusive woman trying to hit the man and hit the flirty girl instead, puzzled me. We argued about its racial elements .. the least you can say is it was in poor taste.

I liked the Eminem Chrysler/Detroit ad, I was really rooting for Detroit .. I liked the Lassie Chevy pickup ad .. the VW Beetle ad with the insects was clever.

The ones I absolutely hated -- the car that reads you Facebook updates, and the Kenny G car commercial.

All in all .. none of the commercials are destined to be classics.

Okay, now back to muting commercials .. but that's not really true, there are several that I enjoy .. love the Kraft one of the little kid on the school bus with a slice of cheese stuck over his eye .. that grin on his face gets me everytime. But gah, I hate Flo of Progressive insurance .. I can't mute it fast enough.

[We have many buffalo near where I live .. they have the right-of-way on their preserve .. sometimes we sit in our cars forever as they meander on the road .. I love to watch them .. they start birthing in Feb., so I will go to see the babies soon .. they are orange and cute as a button. Here's the poem]

Joshua and I had decided to go bowling.
Neither of us had bowled in years, and we didn't
really like to bowl, so it made no sense. We
were driving down Route 9 when we spotted the
buffalo herd. They were grazing in the snow,
and something about their improbable heads made
me catch my breath. I pulled over to the side
of the road. "Why are they here?" Joshua asked.
"I guess it's some kind of cruel joke," I said.
"Well, it's not funny," he said. "They're way
too majestic. Buffalo are supposed to roam,
that's what the song says, not be penned up
along some strip for tourists to see," he
said. "It beats bowling," I said. And so we
sat there for the next hour contemplating the
life of the postmodern buffalo, deconstructing
their owners, and never putting them back
together again.

by James Tate

"Suburban Bison" from Return to the City of White Donkeys. © Ecco Press, 2004. Reprinted with permission.

Remember Bob Marley, the late reggae star? Well, his son Ziggy is coming out with a comic book about a superhero called .. wait for it… wait for it… Marijuanaman! .. a "noble extraterrestrial champion, who has arrived on Earth to deliver an important message and at the same time save his own planet."

It's coming out on April 20 ... when else?

I heard on the radio that Marijuanaman tries to save the earth’s pot fields from an evil pharmaceutical company.

So, in case you think Marijuanaman is just going to sit on the sofa watching Telly Tubbies and eating chips and candy bars, you might remember that Ziggy Marley is an environmentalist and social activist .. so, Marijuanaman will probably hold the same principles.

Will it have a scratch-n-sniff section?

There's so many jokes here it makes my head hurt .. he'll fly higher than anyone else, but, dude, he'll always be late .. or lost ...

Maybe I'll wait for the movie .. because nothing will ever top The Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers .. Fat Freddy's Cat was the best!

BTW - I don't want to brag but I have a specific superpower - the ability to detect potheads at a glance at 25 yards.

Sad news .. guitarist Gary Moore, formerly with Irish rock band Thin Lizzy, was found dead Sunday in a hotel room in Spain. They haven't said the cause of death yet.

Dang, he was legendary .. one of the great rock and blues guitarists .. and only 58.

Thin Lizzy had such hits as - 'Whiskey in the Jar' and 'The Boys Are Back in Town.'

Gary could trade chops with the best of them .. his licks on "Still Got The Blues" are some of the finest blues licks ever recorded. You can see his artistry in this clip ..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuAVHHRlxLg

Rest in peace Gary .. thank you for all the music.

Yesterday was the first time in 5 days that I had the nerve to back my car out of the garage and venture out into the town. Temps were in the 40's .. snow was melting and the streets looked safe enough.

So away I went .. carefully though, thank goodness everybody was driving slowly. Free at last, free at last .. the town looked so pretty .. with so many snowmen to admire.

I browsed around a book store that had a great sale .. poor things suffer a decline of readers because so many people read on the computer. Wonder how long brick and mortar book stores can carry on.

I bought "Way Down Yonder in the Indian Nation" by Michael Wallis .. here is an excerpt:

"Oklahoma is tallgrass prairie and ever-lasting mountains. It is secret patches of ancient earth tromped smooth and hard by generations of dancing feet. It is the cycle of song and heroic deed. It is calloused hands. It is the aroma of rich crude oil fused with the scent of sweat and sacred smoke. It is the progeny of an oil-field whore wed to a deacon; the sire of a cow pony bred with a racehorse. It is a stampede, a pie supper, a revival. It is a wildcat gusher coming in. It is a million-dollar deal cemented with a handshake."

Dang, doncha love it? He had me at "dancing feet" ...

Last stop was the grocery store, where I stocked up with what they had left on the shelves .. not one egg anywhere .. I wasn't the only one who was grabbin' .. at least I got plenty of coffee. I forced myself to buy healthy food - skinless, boneless chicken, fresh fruit, yogurt, romaine lettuce, salad fixin's, etc. .. although I want warm food in cold weather, not cold dang salad.

But the Pig-Out Piper must be paid ...

I came home happy and tired .. stocked up and ready for the next cold snap .. which they say is on its way ...

When I was twelve, a man was burned
not quite to death at my father's
factory. Recovered enough
to walk the town, he didn't know
what to do with himself—a ghost
whose scarred, fire bubbled face made you
look away, though not my father
who felt responsible and so wouldn't
refuse the man's eyes when they fell
upon him. The burned man held no
grudge, thought the accident his
own fault, and sought my father out
as the one whose eyes told him yes,
he was still alive.
So they held long
conversations on the post office
stoop, which I observed from the car
where I waited, where I could read
my father's stiff shoulders, the way
he clutched the mail, how he tilted
his head, even his smile that was
in truth a grimace. I knew just
what my mother knew—my father
had to let himself be tortured
once or twice a week, whenever
Bernard Sawyers saw him in town,
lifted his claw of a hand, rasped
out his greeting that sounded like
a raven that'd been taught to say
Hello, Mr. Huddle, how are you?
They'd stand there talking in the town's
blazing sunlight, the one whom fire
had taken to the edge of death
and the other invisibly
burning while they passed the time of day.

by David Huddle.

"Burned Man" © David Huddle. Used with permission of the poet.

.. says she has nothing in common with his dad.

True - if Reagan were alive today the Tea Party would call him a RINO .. sadly that's how far right the Republicans have shifted.

"LOS ANGELES—Sarah Palin is honoring one Reagan and offending another with the same speech. The former Alaska governor is scheduled to speak in Santa Barbara, Calif., on Friday at a tribute to former President Ronald Reagan—just one of the celebrations marking the centennial of the 40th president's birth on Feb. 6.

But his son, Ron Reagan, tells The Associated Press he doesn't see anything in common between his dad and the 2008 Republican vice presidential candidate, who was invited to speak by the event's sponsor, the conservative Young America's Foundation.

"Sarah Palin is a soap opera, basically. She's doing mostly what she does to make money and keep her name in the news," Reagan says.

"She is not a serious candidate for president and never has been," said Reagan, a political independent whose politics lean left.[..]"

The Republican Party of Ronald Reagan is not the Republican Party of Sarah Palin.

I recall a president who actually thought talking to your enemies is a smart thing, not a traitorous act. He also understood that Mexican immigrants are people first.

I wish I could find that bit on the Daily Show that basically went:

Video clip of Obama - "I want to reduce our nuclear arms by a third."

Clip of Palin on Fox News - "Ronald Reagan would have never tried to do something like that."

Clip of Reagan speech - "I want to reduce our nuclear arms by a third."

A band called The Asylum Street Spankers did this song on Bob & Tom Show and I enjoyed it as much as Bob & Tom .. maybe you will too.

I've been a huge fan of the Spankers for years .. they're an Austin-based band who play many musical styles - blues, country blues, swing, folk, and gospel. They've been called part Betty Boop, part Marx Brothers and part John Belushi.

They've been called neo-swing vaudevillians, but they're not a novelty act. They can sing like there's no tomorrow - Christina Marrs can belt or croon with the best of 'em - and they play the hell out of their instruments .. guitars 'n fiddles 'n dobros 'n such. All acoustic.

Sometimes they do political satire, sometimes they get down and blusey, sometimes they get funny .. but their material is always smart and entertaining.

As with the Leaf Blower song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qh3o1_whqu4

Here's Christina Marrs singing I Got My Mojo Workin':

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQCv97GtaFo

And you might want to hear her do 'I need a little sugar in my bowl' ...

Temps are still well below freezing .. but things are looking up because the Okie weathergods say tomorrow it will be 35 degrees! We're havin' a heat wave!

I am still of good cheer .. but maybe because I am cooking comfort foods, such as homemade mac and cheese, meatloaf and this wonderful soul-satisfying chocolate pudding cake.

A friend called me up and asked how I was doing and I told her fine, except I'm out of chocolate. She asked if I had powdered cocoa on hand and I said yes .. so she shared a recipe for this wonderful Chocolate Mocha pudding cake.

Yes, it's fattening, but I thought to heck with that, it’s cold and icy outside and I need chocolate .. rich, gooey, chocolaty goodness. It's so great I'd like to share it with all of my family and friends.

Easy ooey gooey Chocolate Mocha Cake

Heat oven to 350 degrees, lightly oil an 8x8 glass dish.

Into a medium mixing bowl add 1 cup flour (I used All Purpose) .. 3/4 cup sugar .. 1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder .. 2 tsp baking powder .. 1/4 tsp salt. Mix well using a wire whisk.

Into a small bowl add 1/2 cup milk (I only had coffee creamer) .. 3 Tbsp oil .. and 1 tsp vanilla. Mix well with your whisk and add to flour mixture. Stir well. Pour batter into baking dish, use spatula to get every last dollop.

Into a cup add 1/3 cup sugar and 2 Tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder .. mix well and sprinkle evenly over batter. Then pour 1 cup very HOT coffee over batter - DO NOT STIR. (I used instant coffee and made it a little strong because I love coffee and chocolate together.)

Bake for 30 minutes or until center springs back when touched, do not over bake. This is a pudding style cake, so you want it still bubbly and steamy when you take it out of the oven.

You’ll serve it warm and directly from the dish. When you cut into it a thick, gooey chocolate will be revealed. I thought I had died and gone to heaven ... mmmm.

They may have to use a crane to get me out of here after the big thaw ....

Talking about the artwork of a Polish artist who paints surreal dreamscapes .. some you could call nightmares .. but they're all very detailed, clever and whimsical.

I love the swans in the maze, the car that's half alligator, and the cities built on the backs of sea monsters. I see a hint of M.C. Escher in these paintings .. maybe a drop of Dali. I love the combination of creatures and every day items.

Several of these paintings would make great Pink Floyd album covers.

Each image is creative, well designed and colorful .. and has a story being told. I go back to view them again and again

I would like to live in several of these surreal landscapes .. well, maybe at least visit.

His name is Jacek Yerka and he was born in the 50's .. and he knows the value of the subconscious to the art. A true artistic mind always reveals at least a part of our dreams and unknown parts of ourselves!

Here is a video of his work:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrMKY3EFJOQ

I smacked you in the mouth for no good reason

except that the icicle had broken off

so easily and that it felt like a club

in my hand, and so I swung it, the soft

pad of your lower lip sprouting a drop,

then gushing a trail onto the snow even

through we both squeezed the place with our fingers.

I'd give a lot not to be the swinger

of that icicle. I'd like another

morning just like that, cold windy, and bright

as Russia, your glasses fogging up, your face

turning to me again . I tell you I might

help both our lives by changing that act to this,

by handing you the ice, a gift, my brother.

by David Huddle

"Icicle" © David Huddle. Used with permission of the poet.

Freshman Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) cast the only nay vote against a bill that would make it illegal to aim a laser pointer at an airplane .. he thinks "the states ought to take care of it."

You'd think it'd be obvious that having dozens of different rules for airplane and pilot safety across the country is a horrible idea .. we need a uniform, federal, set of rules for airline safety. Period.

For Rand Paul or anyone else to insinuate that states rights are being violated because they can't make their own rules about aircraft and pilot safety is an absolute loon. Period.

And if you thought Rand would be willing to legislate with reason in the real world .. a vote like this should convince you otherwise. He lives in a fantasy land where he thinks the federal government has no business legislating air traffic safety. Like I said - a loon.

From the Wall Street Journal: "Like father, like son. Libertarian-leaning Rep. Ron Paul (R., Texas) is known in the House as a frequenter lone dissenter on bills. Today, his son, freshman Sen. Rand Paul (R., Ky.), voiced the only "nay" vote on a measure that outlaws aiming a laser pointer at an aircraft.

The amendment to a Federal Aviation Administration reauthorization bill passed 96-1.

The younger Mr. Paul said he thought it was a bad idea to point lasers at pilots, but "there are a lot of states that already have laws, and I think the states ought to take care of it." [..]"

Sooo .. this is probably the first of many votes to make a "point" about states rights.

Rand Paul's neo-confederate take on the Constitution would leave everything from the most basic safety regulations to civil rights to the whims of individual states.

Turning a safety issue for pilots and passengers into a political issue .. claiming to uphold states' rights against federal "government overreach" is a stupid way to try and build up his "street cred" with the extremist Tea Party crowd.

But I'm not surprised .. are you?

Still snowed in, 3rd day .. but enjoying myself royally, propped up on this nice comfy sofa, watching all sorts of crazy sh*t on TV .. like Bravo's Housewives of Beverly Hills. Dang, the last episode with the feuding child star sisters, Kyle and Kim, was straight out of "Whatever Happened to Baby Jane."

But it helped pass the time.

No, I'm not getting Cabin Fever, I love solitude .. the only way I'll get cranky is if I run out of necessities .. like coffee. But I have enough for a few more days .. only thing is I drink more of it just whilin' away the time.

I lucked out when my cold water thawed out, but only in the bathrooms .. the kitchen still has hot water though. Mental note - next house I buy won't have kitchen or bedroom on north side.

Gosh, when I think of what those poor people up northeast are going through, I wouldn't dare complain.

I haven't been outside yet, just stepped out on the front porch - had to shove a pile of snow aside - to see if the mail was 'running' .. nope, no footprints to mailbox. I saw all kind of critter footprints .. bless their tough little hearts. I tossed table scraps out .. hoping birds get them and not field mice. Ah hates vermin!

I saw kids ice skating in the streets. Ice skating! Temps are still only in the teens .. going down to zero tonight. Zero!

.. it could give so many people a reason to live.

There's so much depressing news today .. let's go for some comic relief.

Washington (CNN) - Rep. Michele Bachmann, R-Minnesota, will travel to the early primary state of South Carolina later this month as she mulls a possible White House bid in 2012, CNN has learned.[..]"

Or at the very least - Palin/Bachmann for 2012. Just think, one can't stop winking and the other can't find the camera. Wouldn't debates be fun?

Of course, neither stands a snowball's chance in hell - the sixteen million people who watch Fox News are about the extent of the American people who share their values.

But maybe she's following sister Palin's lead, and just pretending to run for president .. just so she can keep herself in the news to stroke a big ego and promote her 'brand' .. to eventually make some big bucks in a short amount of time.

Then she can write empty books and charge huge speaking fees to talk to Tea Party sheep.

Bachmann made news recently by rewriting American history - her speech in Iowa where she claimed that the founding fathers "worked tirelessly until slavery was no more" .. forgetting about The Civil War and the 618,000 men who died fighting it.

She's done the same with current events like claiming Obama's Asia trip cost $200 million a day. Politifact has caught her lying many times.

Just last week she pissed off a lot of veterans - by suggesting spending cuts to disabled veterans.

Bachmann is an embarrassment almost every time she opens her mouth .. she has accused other elected leaders of being un-American, that there ought to be some sort of investigation. Can you say McCarthyism?

I have family in Minnesota, several live in her 6th District and complain that she has failed to actually work for them .. that she has introduced no important legislation that would do any thing for the residents of Minnesota, or for the rest of the country for that matter.

As Bachmann and Palin get closer to a commitment, it *has* to smoke out some GOP cowards who are afraid to speak against them.

It's going to be the highest of high comedy when these people start running against each other. Right now, they can agree on "Obama = Bad" .. but when they turn on their own it's going to be very entertaining.

Keep that popcorn coming, please!

"The bookies have put the odds out for this weekend. The Packers are slightly favored over the Steelers and the rioters are slightly favored over President Mubarak." –Jay Leno

"Egypt has responded to hundreds of thousands of protesters by shutting down the internet. Listen, if you want people to stay home and do nothing, turn the internet back on." –Conan O'Brien

"I haven't seen this many protestors in Cairo since the last time they announced Brendan Fraser was doing another one of those 'Mummy' movies." –Jay Leno

"Egypt has shut off cell phones and the internet. It’s like visiting your parents’ house." –David Letterman

"Huge riots continue in Egypt. Experts say one of the problems over there is there is a huge difference in wealth between the extremely rich and the vast majority of the people who have nothing. Thank God that could never happen in this country, huh?" –Jay Leno

"John Boehner, the congressman from Ohio, is the new speaker of the House. We know that he cries. It's some sort of enzyme problem. If he can't find his car keys, he'll just sit down and sob." –David Letterman

"North Korea has opened an amusement park comparable to Disneyland. I'm not sure how long it's going to last because Kim Jong Il isn't tall enough to go on any of the rides." –Conan O'Brien

"Rep. Michele Bachmann created controversy when she said in a speech that the Founding Fathers worked tirelessly until slavery was no more. Apparently she spent her high school history class looking off to the right of the blackboard." –Seth Meyers

"There were two Republican responses to the State of the Union. So if you watched the whole night, it was kind of evolution in reverse. You have Obama, then Paul Ryan, and then Michele Bachmann. Then Animal Planet had a squirrel monkey give his take." –Bill Maher

"You saw the big controversy with Michele Bachmann. She did not look directly into the camera, which made it harder for the teabaggesr to masturbate." –Bill Maher

"She didn't look into the camera. She said Ameican was created by a miracle, and secret armies of IRS agents are trying to take away your light bubls. And then Sarah Palin tweeted, 'Game on, bitch." –Bill Maher

"Sarah Palin weighed in on Sputnik. She got everything wrong. She said the Russians won the space race and that the Soviet Union collapsed because of Sputnik, which was in 1957, and they collapsed in 1991. She's not even dumb for a politician. She's dumb for a reality show contestant." –Bill Maher

"Palin is an expert on Sputnik, she said, because she can see the moon from her house." –Bill Maher

"The Egyptian protesters are using Facebook to get away from the police, but the police are using Farmville to build fences to keep the protesters in." –Jay Leno

"A Washington Post columnist is proposing February be a Sarah Palin-free month. You know a better month? November 2012." –Jay Leno

"As you know, just another huge snowstorm back east. It completely shut down Washington, D.C. It's like the tea party's dream come true. Mother Nature did what they couldn't." –Jay Leno

"President Obama answered questions on YouTube. He was asked 7,500 times about legalizing marijuana. And that was just from Chad in Portland." –Conan O'Brien

"Congress is proposing a bill that would give President Obama a kill switch that he could use to freeze all activity on the Internet if there were a national emergency. The kill switch goes by the top-secret name Microsoft Windows." –Conan O'Brien

"A storm hit the East Coast yesterday leaving 300,000 people in the Washington, D.C., area without power. The 300,000 people without power in Washington are called Democrats." –Conan O'Brien

"Ohio Congressman Dennis Kucinich has filed a lawsuit against the Congress cafeteria for damage done to his teeth after he ordered a sandwich wrap and bit into an olive pit. Dennis Kucinich biting into an olive pit is like a regular-sized person biting into a Bocce ball." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Did you know Kucinich means 'kitchen' in lawn gnome?" –Jimmy Kimmel

"We're abandoning the color coded warning system for terror alerts and are going back to the old system of tagging people with beards. No, they're going to announce when you get to the airport what kind of search procedures they're using. [Clip of airport with announcer saying, "Today is a testicle search day."] And it goes faster if you put them in a ziploc bag." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Someone hacked the Facebook account of French President Nicolas Sarkozy. Or not really hacked. Someone asked for his password and he surrendered it." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Facebook says they're very concerned about this. And they are committed to making sure the only people who will be able to take and sell your personal information without your consent is them." –Jimmy Kimmel

[a tip of the hat to Daniel Kurtzman, NYT-laughlines, and newsmax.com]

Boy, all you righteous true-believers better get your affairs in order - Christian broadcaster Harold Camping says the Rapture is going to take place on May 21, 2011 .. four months’ notice is not a lot.

Being a non-believer I had to go to Wikipedia and brush up on the Rapture. Seems that Jesus will appear, trumpets blaring, angels flying and "a gathering of saints."

Sounds sorta like the Mardi Gras .. but the Rapture is serious business, a Judgment Day when true Christians will ascend into heaven with Jesus and the angels.

I think I'm flat out of luck .. because as much as I admire the philosophy of Jesus and all, I just don't think he was supernatural.

Anyway, you true fundamental Christians better start cleansing your souls of mean thoughts about Democrats and Obamacare and such .. because it sure won't matter now. And I guess we won't have to hear about whether the president is a US citizen any more.

Too bad you'll miss the 2012 election .. we heathens will probably win races hand over fist .. you not being here to vote and all.

And I'm sorry I won't be able to see Sarah Palin's face when Jesus sets her straight about what he really meant.

It it were me, I'd go shopping and dancing .. binge on every fattening thing I'd been craving .. don't worry about those extra pounds .. those heavenly robes probably hide a multitude of sins, pardon the expression.

You know, this Camping fellow predicted the Rapture would come back in 1994. He was wrong then, maybe he's wrong now .. yet, what with all those birds plunging dead from the sky, earthquakes, tidal waves, cyclones, record blizzards, etc., yeah, sure sounds like End Times to me.

But hey, even if Camping is wrong, so what? The Mayans calendar runs out next year .. that's another whole year to have fun. I'd head to Vegas baby .. spend your kid's inheritance .. they won't be needing that money anyway.

And don't forget, I'll take all those houses, jewelry, cars, RVs, boats and stuff off your hands.

Yes, still haven't gone outside .. lucked out yesterday though, it stopped snowing around noon and the leccy stayed on .. but the high was only 10 degrees and my cold water froze. Still have hot water .. I took the hottest shower I've ever had .. and the fastest.

Water will stay frozen for a few days .. temp dipped down to 5 degrees last night, the weathergods say 14 will be the high today. We won't get above freezing until the weekend.

TV tells people to stay home, there's ice under the snow .. but I watched my silly neighbor down the road slide down his driveway (on a hill) and spin around in the middle of the street. He finally got out and left it there.

Me? I'm having a ball, enjoying free time to do anything I want .. which strangely was a little spring cleaning, cleaning out junk drawers and closets. I didn't climb the ladder to clean the ceiling fans .. thinking I'd be in a pickle if I fell and needed an ambulance.

Today I'll catch up on my journal, and maybe work on some wall hangings in my craft room .. and of course blog a little, a way to stay in touch with my family and friends, who hate that I hate Facebook ...

First I'll bake some lovely banana muffins because I have some bananas that are going downhill .. then have some for brekky with coffee that I'm trying to forget was made with water from the hot water heater.

New Rule: With the Super Bowl only a week away, Americans must realize what makes NFL football so great: socialism. That's right, for all the F-15 flyovers and flag waving, football is our most successful sport because the NFL takes money from the rich teams and gives it to the poor teams .. just like President Obama wants to do with his secret army of ACORN volunteers.

Green Bay, Wisconsin has a population of 100,000. Yet this sleepy little town on the banks of the Fock-if-I-know River has just as much of a chance of making it to the Super Bowl as the New York Jets - who next year need to just shut the hell up and play.

Now, me personally, I haven't watched a Super Bowl since 2004, when Janet Jackson's nipple popped out during half time, and that split-second glimpse of an unrestrained black titty burned my eyes and offended me as a Christian.

But I get it - who doesn't love the spectacle of juiced-up millionaires giving each other brain damage on a giant flat-screen TV with a picture so realistic it feels like Ben Roethlisberger is in your living room, grabbing your sister?

It's no surprise that some 100 million Americans will watch the Super Bowl next week - that's 40 million more than go to church on Christmas - what about that, Jesus! It's also 85 million more than watched the last game of the World Series, and in that is an economic lesson for America. Because football is built on an economic model of fairness and opportunity, and baseball is built on a model where the rich almost always win and the poor usually have no chance. The World Series is like Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. You have to be a rich bitch just to play. The Super Bowl is like Tila Tequila. Anyone can get in.

Or to put it another way, football is more like the Democratic philosophy. Democrats don't want to eliminate capitalism or competition, but they'd like it if some kids didn't have to go to a crummy school in a rotten neighborhood while others get to go to a great school and their Dad gets them into Harvard. Because when that happens "achieving the American dream" is easy for some, and just a fantasy for others.

That's why the NFL runs itself in a way that would fit nicely on Glenn Beck's chalkboard - they literally share the wealth, through salary caps and revenue sharing - TV is their biggest source of revenue, and they put all of it in a big commie pot and split it 32 ways. Because they don't want anyone to fall too far behind. That's why the team that wins the Super Bowl picks last in the next draft. Or what the Republicans would call "punishing success."

Baseball, on the other hand, is exactly like the Republicans, and I don't just mean it's incredibly boring. I mean their economic theory is every man for himself. The small market Pittsburgh Steelers go to the Super Bowl more than anybody - but the Pittsburgh Pirates? Levi Johnston has sperm that will not grow up and live long enough to see the Pirates in a World Series. Their payroll is about $40 million, and the Yankees is $206 million. They have about as much chance at getting in the playoffs as a poor black teenager from Newark has of becoming the CEO of Halliburton. That's why people stop going to Pirate games in May, because if you're not in the game, you become indifferent to the fate of the game, and maybe even get bitter - that's what's happening to the middle class in America. It's also how Marie Antoinette lost her head.

So, you kind of have to laugh - the same angry white males who hate Obama because he's "redistributing wealth" just love football, a sport that succeeds economically because it does exactly that. To them, the NFL is as American as hot dogs, Chevrolet, apple pie, and a second, giant helping of apple pie. But then again, they think they're macho because their sport is football, when honestly - is there anything gayer than wearing another man's shirt?

Thanks to huffingtonpost.com.

Women in peignoirs are floating around
the landscape well out of eyesight
let alone reach. They are as palpable
as the ghost of my dog Rose whom I see
on long walks, especially when exhausted
and my half-blind eyes are blurred by cold wind
or sleet or snow. The women we've mistreated
never forgive us nor should they, thus their ghostly
energies thrive at dawn and twilight in this vast
country where any of the mind's movies can be played
against this rumpled wide-screened landscape.
Our souls are travelers. You can tell when your own
is gone, and then these bleak, improbable
visits from others, their dry tears because you were
never what you weren't, so that the world
becomes only what it is, the unforgiving flow
of an unfathomable river. Still they wanted you otherwise,
closer to their dreamchild, just as you imagined
fair maidens tight to you as decals to guide
you toward certainties. The new pup, uncrippled by ideals,
leaps against the fence, leaps at the mountains beyond.

by Jim Harrison

"Angry Women" from Saving Daylight. © Copper Canyon Press, 2006. Reprinted with permission.

That's what Jon Stewart called Sarah Palin in a very funny Daily Show skit: From Russia With Gov.

It was another one of Stewart's great news moments - comedy magic. He took Palin’s "WTF" assessment of Obama’s State of the Union speech and came up with the only logical conclusion - Sarah Palin is a Russian Agent!

In case you missed it, click here.

See, last week Palin was on Fox News talking about President Obama's State of the Union address. She had a little fun with the unfortunate abbreviation of the speech’s "Win The Future" theme .. then she said something about the Sputnik Moment and suddenly went rogue with the facts, saying that the Russians won the space race, but it led to the fall of the Soviet Union.

Stewart does his puzzled Scooby Doo routine, then goes through the fallacies of her analysis. He asked, "Who would purposefully twist around historic facts and put out such a willful misunderstanding of the president’s words?"

"Don’t you see? She is a Russian agent! Most comfortable in long, northern winters. Her favorite color is…red! What is the mascot of Russia? A bear! You are totally a super-hot Russian spy!"

By Jove, I think Stewart is on to something. She can see Russia from her house .. she has a terrible knowledge of American history .. she knows very little about American domestic current events .. or even the fine points of the English language ("aspire the American people") ...

Something nasty this way came last night - Oklahoma had lightning, thunder, wind, snow and sleet. I knew it was on it's way, so I am well prepared .. happy even, as long as my leccy stays on, which is what my British friend calls electricity.

Last year's ice storm left me without power for 7 days .. I survived because I stayed in the kitchen with my gas cook stove and oven .. and a lovely hot water heater so I could take hot showers and bubble baths .. before I climbed between sheets as cold as ice.

But so far so good, it's mostly powdery snow piling up .. a coating of ice probably underneath .. but not on tree limbs .. yet.

Anyway I'm up early .. excited as a kid, running to peek outside every few minutes .. made a big pot of coffee to enjoy with my computer time. Oh joy, no place to go, nothing to do .. I get to sit here all day.

As the snow piles up outside, my thoughts go back in time .. I wonder how our ancestors survived winters like this two to four hundred years ago.

I know that the Indians around here always had buffalo/deer/elk jerky .. and they dried corn, beans, squash, mushrooms and pumpkin, keeping a lot of it stashed in containers below ground for the hard times. They could make corn bread, pumpkin bread, and all kinds of soup.

Then they made hot tea from dried herbs like mint, sassafras root .. and of course they had medicinal teas. My mother and aunt harvested and dried Yarrow to use for everything from headaches to sore throats.

Me? I'm good to go .. I stocked up on everything from candles to chocolate yesterday .. and cooked up a big pot of pinto beans and ham, baked cornbread muffins and sweet potatoes .. Okie Haute Cuisine.

Now if only my leccy holds out ...